Are We There Yet?

Are We There Yet?
This is the sign that is over the front door of Aileen's and my house, our home, going OUT. Meaning that when someone leaves our house they are going into the ACTUAL Mental Ward.

I've always felt that way. When it is considered how much ugliness and killing and hatred there is in the world today, it actually makes perfect sense that this sign is over the door going out of the house.

Because that's where the real mental ward is.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Setting the Record Straight

Dragon NaturallySpeaking:

I want to make this extremely and perfectly clear.  In a 45 years I have been installing computers and software.  I have never hated a program.  Meaning a computer program, as much as I hate Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5.  Never.

Effective immediately, I have destroyed every single programming disc for Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5.  I have deleted every aspect of version 11 and 11.5 from my system.  There is no way that I will ever be able to use that program again and that is exactly the way that I want it.

I am terminating any and all associations with the Nuance Corporation.  I am blocking their website.  I will not receive any more of their publications under any circumstances.

Dragon NaturallySpeaking 11.5 is absolutely the worst piece of programming I have ever used with the exception of only one other kind of programming.

The only other programs that ever caused me as much frustration and made my life as difficult as Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5 with Windows Vista.  And I will never under any circumstances forgive Steve Ballmer for pushing Windows Vista on the consumers of this world.  Steve Ballmer has lost all of my respect because he was so illiterate and such a selfish and horrible person that he lied to the entire world and push Windows Vista on the consumers in this world.  I will never forgive Steve Ballmer for doing that.

I will never forgive the Nuance Corporation for lying to me about Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11.  And version 11.5.  I will never forgive them for lying to me.

As a result of the tremendous amount of horrible experience I have had with Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5.  I will not under any circumstances be upgrading to Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 12.  I do not feel comfortable under any circumstances, trusting the Nuance Corporation.

My Writing:

Just because I don't make any money from my writing does not mean that my writing has no value.  And it certainly does not mean that I look at my time.  In any other way that just as anyone else who is actually working for a living.  I run his computer system here in my home and I run my life just exactly as if I were still doing business in the everyday world.  So when I talk about production time.  I'm talking about time that I need in order to get certain things accomplished on my computer system.  So that I can get everything else accomplished in my daily life.

For this purpose, I am including at the bottom of this Journal entry.  A listing of the profile of my computer system so that any of you who are technically oriented will have a better idea of the type of computer system I own and operate.

My Life:

I want to make this extremely clear.  When I was talking about the different things that I witnessed in my life in my previous Journal entry.  And some of the rather horrific things.  I was witnessing and that I was part of.  These were accidents.  Mostly they were traffic accidents.  And these situations took place during the mid-1970s to the mid-1980s.

I have not provided the specifics because I do not under any circumstances want to take credit for anything that I was part of or for being the first responder in any of these situations.  That's not why I was talking about those things and that is not why I responded to the various accidents that I came upon what I was in fact put in the situation where I ended up being the first responder.

I mentioned those things.  Only because I was trying to illustrate how emotionally strenuous the month of March is for me.  Based on my losing my darling Aileen.  This is my Journal.  I don't have any other place to vent my feelings were talk about what is going on inside of me other than right here, unless I do so on my computer.  And I learned a long time ago that the phrase, no man is an island, is extremely true.  And I do not mean anything sexist by that at all.

The fact is that I share my Journal online, because I know that there are people who are suffering tremendously in their own lives dealing with a lot of different issues.  And because my life has been so very.  And in many ways quite remarkable.  I know that by sharing what has gone on in my life and how I'm dealing with my life now.  That by doing so, I actually might be able to help some of these other people were some of the people in the world who are reading my Journal who are actually having much more difficulty in their own lives and may feel a lot of times that they are having to do so alone.

Windows Vista was such a terrible experience for me that at one point.  It actually contributed to my having to go into a mental health facility for a solid week.  Because I had a slight psychological break.  It was not the cause.  But it definitely contributed to that event.  At one point prior to that circumstance coming about, I had to restart my machine 75 times before, Windows Vista would start properly.

It was on that day plus a number of other factors going on at the same time.  That caused me to have a minor psychological break, where I actually had to go into a mental health facility for a week to recuperate.

I will never forgive Steve Ballmer for choosing to lie to the consumers like you did with Windows Vista.  I will never forgive him for that no matter what.  I still have the document, where I was talking about my experience during dead week inside the mental health facility on the side of my refrigerator, here in my home.

The choices I made in my life, I made as a result of a huge number of factors.  Most of which I have never really talked about in my journal other than the other day when I was trying to compare the amount of dishonesty and the lying that went on in my mothers and fathers home as compared to when I was with my grandmother and my aunt Helen.

But other than that one particular Journal entry I have never really discussed a lot of the factors for why I have moved my life in the direction that it actually went.  I plan on doing that in the future.  But I cannot do that, if I am being pushed around by software makers who are so dishonest.  And who are so filled with greed that all they care about is getting their money.  Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5 might in fact work on some people's computer systems.  It has never worked on my system.  Never.

And I will never forgive you want to Corporation for lying to me about Dragon NaturallySpeaking 11 and version 11.5.  Or it I will never forgive them for that.  And they have lost my trust for the rest of my life.  I will never do business with them ever again.  I don't want to use any more of their upgrades.  I don't want anything to do with your company.  The only version I have ever used.  Since I started using Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 9 that has ever really worked on my system was Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 10 and version 10.5.

For anyone to think that I enjoy not being able to use my right hand more is probably making a big mistake.  Because I would much rather be able to use my hands than having to use a speech program.  But I don't have any choice.  And I am not about to sit back and do nothing with the rest of my life.  I'm not going to do that.

If someone else wants to sit around and drink beer and become an alcoholic and just basically a waste of time.  That's their choice.  But I don't believe in doing that and I don't do that with my life and I'm not going to start now.

Is now 5:28 AM.  I have just with the beginning of this Journal entry spent the last 2 1/2 hours cleaning out my system as a result of another crash caused by Dragon NaturallySpeaking 11 and Dragon NaturallySpeaking 11.5.  That is the last time the Dragon NaturallySpeaking is ever going to ruin any of my production time.  They will never do so again.  Because if they do, I will take whatever action the law allows against Dragon NaturallySpeaking.  Meaning, the Nuance Corporation, and any and all pertinent parties of the Nuance Corporation, who may in fact be responsible or any action that may in fact take place, pursuant to what I have described above.

I am drawing a line in the sand.  I will never allow the Nuance Corporation to screw up my production time ever again.  I will never allow them to lie to me again.  It will not happen.  I will never buy any of their products.  I will have nothing to do with them ever again.  I will never forgive them for lying to me about Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and 11.5.

Just like I am never going to forgive Steve Ballmer for lying to me and to the consumers of this world about Windows Vista.  I will never forgive him for lying.  It will not happen.

I do not hate anyone in this world.  But I most certainly hate that kind of behavior, where a company or where a person is more concerned with money than they are with telling the truth.  And for the Nuance Corporation to claim that Dragon NaturallySpeaking 1111.5 is a good program is a filthy lie.  All anyone has to do is look at my system updates for the last two and half years.  To see very clearly that I have had nothing but trouble with Dragon NaturallySpeaking version 11 and version 11.5.

I will never have that kind of trouble again on my system.  Not now.  Not ever.

I happen to know personally, a number of programmers throughout this world.  People who I have made associations with as a result of using their software.  And in reality, we have become rather good friends.  They are from all over this world.  And they know that I absolutely respect honesty more than anything in the world.  They know that.  Just like anyone who reads my Facebook page or anyone who reads my journal knows that as far as I'm concerned, honesty is my number one mandate.

I cannot help the fact that our world has become so preoccupied with lying.  That's not my fault.  But I am not going to join the rest of the world.  And accommodate lying in my life.  That's not going to happen.  People in my life only get three chances.  If they lie to me once they are worn.  If they lying to me twice.  They are told that they lied to me a third time.  I will have nothing to do with them and that there will be no warning.

I have lived my life.  That way ever since I was 16 years old and when I escaped literally from my mothers and fathers home.  Because when I got out of that house I decided I would never tolerate lying in my own life.  Because that's all my mother and father ever did.  They lied to each other they lied to both of us meeting my sister Mary and myself.  They lied to everyone.  Because lying was a part of their life.  Which is why I grew up hating lying.

As far as my being able to see a psychologist.  I want everyone to understand very clearly.  I do not like the term, Obama care.  I don't like that term.  Because I don't believe that is what is going on.  I will never say that the medical practitioners for the most part in the United States or this world are evil or bad.  I don't believe that.  90% of the medical practitioners I have known in my life are some of the most remarkable and kind people I've ever had the pleasure and the honor of knowing.

But at the same time, it makes absolutely no sense.  When all I get every month is $1230.  That's all I get to live on.  It makes no sense for me to spend $100-$120 of that money every month just to go and see a psychologist.  That doesn't make any sense.

I spend the money with AT&T, because I promised my darling Aileen I would maintain this house.  And she and I talked about how much money we have spent on our Internet connection with AT&T.  And our land line and our cell phones.  And before Aileen died.  She agreed with me that of all the choices I might make the maintaining my commitment to AT&T was extremely important.  My darling Aileen was really grateful before she died for the fact that during those eight months.  When she went into six different liver comas.  That two of those instances AT&T was directly and physically involved in every way in saving her life.

She was extremely grateful for that.  And she made me promise that I would never turn my back on AT&T.  She said, there is no amount of money that could ever equal the kindness and the absolute terror was a that AT&T show.  When Aileen was about to die two different times during those eight months.  And it was on those two different occasions or circumstances were AT&T physically became involved and without their help.  Aileen would've died.

So I spent more money on my AT&T services that I spend on any other bill that I have.  And I don't care.  I get a lot for the money I spend with AT&T.  And I am honored to spend that money.  Because when I was in the darkest place in my life scared to death that my wife was going to die.  AT&T was right there next to me, doing everything they could to make sure she did not.

You can't see my face right now.  So you can't see the tears streaming down my cheeks.  You can't see me crying.  Not because I'm sad, because I am so grateful that when I was terrified out of my wits that my darling wife was going to die these wonderful people at AT&T told me not to give up.

No amount of money.  Not one bit of money can ever equal the courage and kindness to AT&T showed me when I was so absolutely terrified.

And I make a point every time I talk to any one of their customer service people of expressing my absolute and supreme gratitude for what they did.  I am honored to be able to say thank you to them.

I knew when Aileen got sick that I had no hope.  I knew I had no hope.  But I had to convince Aileen otherwise.  I had to convince her that there was hope.  Even though I felt in my heart that there was none.  I had to shut down my emotions and I had to do everything I could, I had to use every single thing I had ever learned in my life.  Just to try and give her more of her own.

And I look at those eight months as one of the most magnificent gifts that God ever gave me.  I am so honored and humbled by being allowed to supreme honor to use everything I ever knew to do everything I ever could to try and save her life.

And I could not save her life.  And I'm making these points clear because I don't want anyone to think harshly of the choices I make in my life.  I spend a little bit of money I have in the ways that I spend that money.  Because I will not turn my back on any company that was helping me to try and give my darling wife.  Some degree of peace or who is helping me to try and save her life.

Everyone talks badly about cable services and DirecTV and dish network and Netflix.  I maintain my membership with Netflix and I maintain my membership with DirecTV.  Because with my darling Aileen going through so much terrible horrible pain.  It was the movies on Netflix and the TV shows on Netflix and the movies and TV shows on DirecTV.  That gave her any comfort at all.

I will never put any monetary value on the kindness that the people at DirecTV and Netflix showed my darling Aileen while she was dying.  I will never put a price on that.  And if I have to change my eating habits and if I have to change my diet to accommodate these costs then that is exactly what I will do.  They didn't turn their back on me so I am never going to turn my back on them.

I am sure that there are a lot of people who laugh at me.  Because I'm still crying for my darling Aileen.  But those people don't understand how much love my darling Aileen and I still have for each other.  It doesn't matter that she's on the other side of the veil.  It doesn't matter one single bit.  We are is connected now as we were from the very day we met.  And my love is 10 times stronger now than it has ever been.  It increases every single day.  Not a single morning goes by without me going over to her ashes and thanking her with all my heart for allowing me to love her as much as I do.  I always say good morning to my darling Aileen and I will do so for the rest of my life and I am honored to be able to feel that love.

I'm not going to measure my life in terms of what others measured their lives in terms of.  My life has never been able to be measured by someone else's life.  Things happen to me that made me different.  They didn't make me special they just made me different.  And I know that.  I have never aspired to try to be better than anyone else.  I've only tried my best every single day of my life to do better at being myself.  And I know my failures.  I know how many times I have fallen down.  I know that a lot of times I end up looking ridiculous.  But I don't care.  God doesn't hate me.  Because of God hated me, God would let me know.

And I don't hate anyone in this world and I never have and I never will.  It is behavior that I hate not individuals.  I hate the way that we make choices.  I hate the choices that we make.

When I look at the members of the United States Congress.  I am disgusted.  These people don't know how to compromise.  And by the fact that they are not compromising.  They are showing tremendous disrespect for our founding fathers.  Those men and women in 1776 gave their lives to set up this grand experiment.  The United States made history in this world.  Because it was the first nation in the history of the world to be based upon liberty and freedom and justice for every single member of the country.

And when our founding fathers developed and formed and wrote the Constitution of these United States.  It was based on compromise.  So when all of these right wing Christian extremists talk about their patriotism.  They are nothing but liars.  Because they are not willing to make any kind of compromise.  And by the fact that they are not willing to compromise they are showing tremendous hatred and disrespect and disregard for the principles upon which this nation was founded.

You can't call yourself a patriot in this country.  If you are not willing to support and defend the principles upon which this nation was founded.  Being a patriot doesn't mean simply waving the flag.  Being a patriot means embracing and supporting and defending the principles upon which this nation was created.  And this nation was created on the basis of compromise.  So for any Republican or any right-wing extremist to claim that they are in fact patriotic if they are not willing to compromise is a filthy lie.

We as Americans should stop arguing with each other and start to remember that our nation was not formed on the basis of how much we were alike.  Our nation was formed on the basis of how different we were.  And that in spite of those differences we would love each other enough and love this country enough to stand by each other and this nation no matter what.  And we are no longer doing that.

I am nothing to this world I know that.  Hardly anyone takes me seriously.  I know that as well.  But God takes me seriously.  God knows my heart and God knows my soul.  And God loves my darling Aileen because of God did love my darling Aileen and God would not have reached down to take Aileen into his arms and to take her home.

Nothing is going to change the mind of any of the right wing extremists in this nation.  They will continue to hate me and to lie about me.  Even after I am dead and gone.  And I don't care.  Because the reality is, no human being is going to stand over my soul and decide where my soul goes when I die.  Because no human being owns my soul.  My soul does not belong to humanity.  My soul belongs to God.

My life may in fact be occupied would have been dedicated to humanity.  My soul belongs to God.  And it always will, no matter what.  I may not be religious, but for anyone to think that I am not spiritual is making a very serious mistake.  Not one with any major ramifications are just making a mistake.  Because I am deeply spiritual and I have always been so.  Nobody can be 17 years old and watch nine children dying in front of them during eight months and remain unchanged.  It's impossible.  When I came out of that award in 1969 I was completely and totally different.  I wasn't the same person emotionally or psychologically.  It was impossible for me to be so.  I had died.  And no one was able to bring me back.  God sent me back.  And I have tried to explain repeatedly.  The terms of why God sent me back.

But hardly anyone understands, nor do they believe me.  No big deal.  Like I've said before.  I can always tell when someone is lying.  Because they generally will say the phrase, you'll definitely hear from me again.  Or I'm definitely going to get in touch with you again.  Because every time I hear that phrase I know that the person on the other end of the conversation is lying.  Because those are the exact same phrases I have heard all my life from people who had no intention of having anything to do with me ever again.

When someone wanted to get in touch with many repeatedly after our first encounter.  They never said that phrase.  They never said a word.  They allowed their actions to do their talking for them.

It was because of my mother and father and how they lie to everyone in lie to each other.  That I actually began subscribing to that phrase, Bullshit walks, money talks.  Actions speak louder than words.

Because I began to realize that anyone can say anything they want.  Let them show me with their actions, what kind of human they are.  Let their actions do their talking.

I have tried to explain to Aileen's brother and sister, Claude and Evelyn.  That theory in the modern day world, I am not really judged on what I've physically do.  Because hardly anyone ever sees me.  But that I am judged on the basis of what I write.  And the reason I say, that is because I have always maintained, that if someone writes anything down or says anything publicly.  In any way.  If they are not prepared to die for what they are writing down or what they are saying that the first question everyone should have on their mind is very simple.  If someone is not prepared to die for what they are writing or what they are saying that everyone should ask, why are they saying what they are saying?  And why are they writing what they are writing?  If they are not prepared to die for what they are saying or writing?

I have always been prepared to die at any given second for anything I have ever said anything I have ever written.  Just like I am prepared to die this instant for what I am writing and what I am saying right now.  And I say this, because I want everyone who is reading this Journal entry to understand that I take words very seriously.  That doesn't mean I'm not as guilty as any other human being, mistakenly saying something.  But if I do say something mistakenly I always apologize.  I always do, because I take words very seriously.

In my household, my parents used words like fists.  And her words used to beat the living hell out of me.  And it wasn't their words, then it was their behavior.

So as far as going to see a psychologist.  I don't believe that's going to happen anytime soon.  And I don't want anyone to start talking about Obama care because that's not the problem.  The problem is, medical administration.  I was a bill collector for five years for the medical industry.  Everything I saw and everything I experienced during that time, literally proved to me that medical administration in the United States is the real problem of why people are having the ability to access to affordable medical care.  But that is what I understand as a result of my being a financial analyst and having been a bill collector for the medical industry for five solid years.

And one of my clients was MetroHealth medical center.  In many ways, I know more about their medical accounting than they do.

But I am not going to spend $120 of my money just to go and see a psychologist once a month.  When in reality, I may not be able to see that psychologist for more than about 20 minutes.  That's not going to work.

I can't make those kinds of decisions.  My cats for the last four days have had hardly any food to eat.  Thank God that at 12 noon today I'm going shopping.  So that I can finally get some food for these wonderful animals and get some food into this house.  I'm also going to make sure I get the drain cleaner I need to fix the bathroom.  I'm also going to get the proper ear wax removal solution so I can finally resolved the hearing problem.  I am having in my left ear.

And it's important for people to understand that when I was extremely athletic.  As a bicyclist and as a long-distance runner.  Those times were before, I had blown out and urged in both of my legs as a result of sciatic nerve problems.  I developed sciatic nerve problems because of pinched nerves at the base of my spine due to both of my hips.  Having been fused to my waist.

Those problems did not exist.  When I was a bicyclist meaning a long-distance bicyclist.  And when I was a long-distance runner.  Because those problems did not take place until the late 1980s.

Today is going to be a very strenuous day.  I have to put myself together and make myself look presentable so that I can go out and do this job.  And then I have to come home and make sure the cats finally get the food they need and to make sure everything else is done.  The greatest thing that has happened is that I finally went back to doing online banking.  Because doing so actually made paying the bills.  So much easier than it has been for me for the last 2 1/2 years.

And I've been reading on Web MD about how rheumatoid arthritis can actually make you tired.  And they're right.  Because my rheumatoid arthritis is not only in my hands.  It's all through the trunk of my body and my spine and my right lung.  Meaning my right rib cage.  So what?  What do I care?  When I'm faced with anything that is difficult.  I grit my teeth plant my feet and just keep moving.

And I don't want anyone thinking that I'm angry right now because I'm not.  I am simply determined.  I don't like asking for help.  I never have.  There is so much suffering in this world that I feel very embarrassed if I ever asked for help at all under any circumstances.  So I just don't like asking for any help.  At least not unless my back is absolutely up against the wall.

For anyone to think that I am not grateful to United States of America and every one of the wonderful people in this country for enacting the laws regarding Social Security.  Whereby I am given the honor of having a little bit of money to be able to survive on.  That is also making a mistake.  Because I am grateful every single day for the amount of money I get to be able to survive on.  I am extremely grateful.  I make jokes about it because I make jokes about a lot of things.  And I do that because I would rather make jokes been rather to complain.  I don't like complaining.

That doesn't mean I don't complain.  Because I do.  I'm just like any other human being.  We all get into those times when we feel sorry for ourselves.  But I don't spend a lot of time in wallowing in self-pity because it never does anything for me.  It doesn't decrease my pain.  It doesn't fix anything.  So generally I just put up and shut up and keep going.

That's what I constantly use the phrase, put up and shut up.  Because that's how I talk to myself.  Those are the rules that I put on myself.  And I have never whether I was a partner with my father in our company of pioneer linen supply.  Or whether I was running one of my own companies or wherever I was working.  I have never asked any of my employees or anyone who is subordinate to me in any company could do anything I was not prepared to do myself.

And under most circumstances.  When something had to be done.  I didn't simply go to my subordinates and give them in order to get it done.  I usually would take off my suit jacket and roll up my sleeves and stand right next to them by their side and I would simply say.  Let's do it together.  I never asked anyone to do anything I was not prepared to do myself.  Not once, not ever.

So when I use the phrase put up and shut up.  It needs to be understood, that is how I talk to myself.  When I know something has to get done I always tell myself to simply put up and shut up and get it done.  Because that is exactly what I have to do in order to get my life moving forward.  I have always had to do that.  I haven't had the luxury the a lot of people have in their own lives to procrastinate.  Because in my life, if something needs to be done.  I'm the only one that will get it done.  Because there's nobody else here.  I have to get it all done.  It's me.  There's no one helping me.  And I don't want anyone to help me.  Because I have to do the work.  If I'm going to have any kind of self-respect I have to do the work.

The reality is, my legs are incredibly strong.  They always have been.  And so on my arms.  But my shoulders and my hips and my waist.  Those are things that have real severe problems.  So that's one of the reasons I use a security camera and a set of security cameras on my home.  Because I have a hard time standing up.  Once I'm standing.  I generally don't have much problem.  Because the problem is not with my legs.  The problem is with my hips.  I have torn nerves and broken nerves all through my hips.  I have pinched nerves in the base of my spine.  I have pinched nerves that are actually inside both of my hips as a result of the operation.

I have been seen by three different orthopedic specialists.  And the verdict is that there is no way to be able to get to those nerves.  Because they say and they have said that if they do, so, I will never walk again.  So of course that's not an option.  When I go somewhere, if there are wheelchairs wherever I am going I will never use a wheelchair.  I will not do that.  There are more than enough people in this world who are having many more severe issues with regard to walking.  Then, I am having.  I will never show disrespect to any of those people.  So as long as I can stay on my feet.  I will do so.  If I have to use two games in a walker I will continue to stay on my feet until I am no longer able to do that.  And when I am no longer able to do that.  Then I will consider using a wheelchair.  But I am not at that point.

I have approximately 6 hours before I have to go out shopping.  And in that time I have to shower and put myself together, and I have to update my budget I have to update my shopping list.  I have to get everything together so that when 12 noon comes around.  I can be ready so that my neighbor can take me out to do the shopping.  Then this afternoon I have to take care of the drain in the bathroom downstairs.  And that's probably going to take a couple of hours.  Then of course I'm going to try and administer the ear wax removal solution to my left ear.  So that I can finally begin hearing normally again.

I have not mentioned the amount of headaches I have been getting as a result of the wax in my left ear.  But, I have been getting headaches.  And there have been times.  Because of the blockage in my left ear that I actually have been getting busy.  But my attitude is always the same.  If something needs to be done I put up and I shut up.  And I just get it done.  So of my left ear is having a problem.  I don't care.  If something needs to get done I put up and I shut up and I get it done.  Or it that's my rule.  That's how I live my life.  I don't make excuses I don't procrastinate.  I put up and I shut up and I get it done.

My darling Aileen depended on the being this way.  And I have been this way all of my life.  Everyone who has known me since 1969 will tell you that has been my attitude my entire life.  When something needed to be done.  I simply put up and shut up and I went ahead and got it done.  Not because I wanted anything as a result of doing what I did.  Because I never did anything with thinking about what I was going to get.  Everything I ever did, I did simply because it made sense to me for me to do what I was doing.  It made sense in my heart it makes sense in my soul and it made sense in my mind.

So, that being said.  I'm running out of time.  So I have to get started on getting everything done.  I don't want anyone to think that I don't love everyone in this world.  Because I do.  Just because I become passionate like I am.  Just because I am bombastic in my writing doesn't mean I don't love everyone.  Because I do.  There's not a single human being in history that I do not love.  I may not like the way they have acted.  And of course, when you are talking about World War II and off Hitler.  I certainly did not like his behavior.  I hated his behavior.  I hated his violence.  I hated his racism.  But the humanity they got put inside of him is what God created.  And I do not hate anything God creates.  I have never hate anything God created.  So there is no one in this world who I hate.  It's not part of what I am about.  It is not part of my makeup.  I am not built that way.

So I have to get started.  And that's what I'm going to do.  I probably won't be able to do another Journal entry and so.  Maybe later tonight or this afternoon.  But, probably tonight.  At least for those who are interested in reading my Journal.

I'm finally back to using Dragon NaturallySpeaking 10.5.  And my system is behaving exactly the way it should.  Finally.  And I'm not going to lose any more production time.  No matter what.  I'm just not going to let that happen.  I can't.

And when I say thank you.  At the bottom of every article.  I hope anyone who is reading my Journal articles knows that I really mean that.  Because I do.  I am very grateful to anyone and everyone who reads anything I write.  I am so grateful that I look at anyone who is reading my articles as extending the a tremendous honor.  I am honored that people feel that my writing is good enough for them to want to read what I write.  I take that as a supreme honor and I always will.  And I am very grateful.  I hope that anyone who is reading this article understand that.

So, that being said.  Like I said I have to get started and get everything done and I only have a certain amount of time to do so.  So, I will probably as I said, write later.

From my heart to yours, always.

Thank you so very much for listening.

See Also:

The mind is like a book. Opened and much is learned. Closed and nothing is learned. (N. Maschke – 1994)

My Dell XPS 410 Computer Configuration:

  • Rating: 3.5 Windows Experience Index
  • Processor: Intel(R) Core(TM)2 CPU 6600 @ 2.40 GHz
  • Installed Memory (RAM) 4.00 GB (3.00 GB usable
  • System Type: 32-bit Operating System

Computer Further Reading:

  1. Windows Live Writer
  2. Hulu
  3. Netflix
  4. FastStone editor
  5. Logitech
  6. Windows 8 
  7. Windows 7 
  8. Windows Vista
  9. Windows XP
  10. IE 8 
  11. IE 9 
  12. IE 10
  13. Firefox
  14. Opera
  15. Google Chrome
  16. Safari 
  17. Thunderbird 
  18. Incredimail
  19. FeedReader
  20. FeedDemon
  21. Pidgin
  22. Yahoo Messenger
  23. Windows Live Messenger
  24. ICQ
  25. Active Desktop Calendar
  26. Trillian
  27. ITunes
  28. QuickTime
  29. CCleaner
  30. WiseCleaner
  31. AOL Messenger
  32. GoogleTalk
  33. Roboform
  34. Avast AntiVirus
  35. AVG
  36. MS Office
  37. MS Outlook
  38. Microsoft Security Essentials
  39. WiseCleaner
  40. Advanced System Care Professional
  41. RSS Bandit 
  42. Atomic Alarm Clock 
  43. Digsby
  44. FeedDemon
  45. MailStore
  46. JustCloud 
  47. winamp
  48. Screamer Radio
  49. Radio Tuna
  50. Meebo
  51. KeyScrambler
  52. Facebook
  53. Blogger
  54. Jango Radio
  55. Picasa
  56. WOT
  57. Zemanta
  58. Prio-Priority Saver 
  59. ISpy Free Surveillance Camera Software
  60. VLC Media Player
  61. PC World
  62. My Computer System
  63. Directory of Free Web Hosting sites
  64. Directory of Free blog services
  65. File A Better Business Bureau Complaint


See Also:

The mind is like a book. Opened and much is learned. Closed and nothing is learned. (N. Maschke – 1994)


    My Significant Journal Entries:

    1. My Biographical Profile
    2. How The Pro Life Movement Murdered My Mother And Thousands Of Other Women In 1950.
    3. Watching The Clouds 
    4. Public Declaration
    5. My Complete Medical Record Of My Caregiving For Aileen
    6. Finding Neverland
    7. How Do I love thee. The First Anniversary Of Aileen's Rosebush
    8. My Philosophy of Life
    9. Second Gear, My discussion of my Pro-Life, and Pro-Choice Position
    10. Walking On The Dark Side Of The Moon
    11. The Time I was hired to photograph and met President-elect Ronald Reagan
    12. My 250 Million Variable Characteristic Hieroglyphic Language
    13. My Global Warming Research
    14. Quantum Mechanics And Newtonian Metaphysics, Originally Dictated On Friday March 19, 2010 (two days before Aileen collapsed and was told she only had 2 months left to live
    15. Pressurized Moments
    16. Religion 101
    17. I Am An Iconoclastic Human Rights Advocate
    18. The Dark Lord
    19. Sand On The Floor
    20. A Human Comedy
    21. The Tortoise And The Hare
    22. Fear: One of Life's Great Motivators
    23. Give Me That Old Time Religion
    24. The Real Explanation of What’s Going On With Japan
    25. The Shadow People
    26. The Music Of The Spheres
    27. The Maschke Dynamic
    28. At Last
    29. Midnight Madness
    30. A Speck Of Dust On A Dirty Beach
    31. Choices of The Heart
    32. Oh There You Are
    33. Finding The Path
    34. Death Be Not Proud
    35. John Denver-The Box
    36. Relevancy
    37. The Environment Of My Mind
    38. The Dented Soul
    39. Talking To The Ghosts In My Heart
    40. A Rumpled And Misunderstood Life
    41. The Metaphysics of Hatred
    42. System Update: The Metaphysics Of Computing
    43. The Letter
    44. Human Rights
    45. Human Rights-An Analysis Part I
    46. Human Rights-An Analysis Part II
    47. North Dakota high school under fire after fans don KKK hoods at state semi boys hockey game
    48. Appearances Are Deceiving
    49. Unfinished Business
    50. The Velvet Hammer
    51. Reality Always Wins
    52. Midnight With The Iron Maiden
    53. The Difference Between Love And Hate
    54. System Update: Comprehensive
    55. Rummaging Through An Old Drawer
    56. Tidying Up
    57. Climbing The Mountain
    58. Clear Vision
    59. Dancing In The Backyard With My Weed Wacker
    60. Exercises In Multi-Directional Thinking
    61. Having Dinner At The Gates Of Hell
    62. Assured Distance
    63. The Dignity Of The Human Soul
    64. The Remarkable Thing
    65. Two … Three … One …
    66. Following The Footprints In The Sand
    67. Second Sight
    68. In The Midst Of Darkness A Single Spark Of Light Guides My Way
    69. Battling Demons In The Darkness
    70. Israel Hits Hamas Government Buildings
    71. Shadow Boxing
    72. Looking At Future's Past
    73. Circles Of  Synchronicity
    74. Well That Was A Bad Idea


    The mind is like a book. Opened and much is learned. Closed and nothing is learned.  (N.  Maschke – 1994)



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