Are We There Yet?

Are We There Yet?
This is the sign that is over the front door of Aileen's and my house, our home, going OUT. Meaning that when someone leaves our house they are going into the ACTUAL Mental Ward.

I've always felt that way. When it is considered how much ugliness and killing and hatred there is in the world today, it actually makes perfect sense that this sign is over the door going out of the house.

Because that's where the real mental ward is.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Running down the Dark Hallway and Turning on the Lights

11:24 PM, EDT:

The me take you back in time a little bit.  It was 10 PM.  And I had just woken up from some kind of a rather profound dream.  That I can't of course remember.  In any event when I woke up the first allow my mind was that when I installed Dragon, DNS, 11.5 this very last time.  I was doing so from a disk that had been sent to me from Dragon NaturallySpeaking.  And then as I was still waking up I started thinking.  And then I realized why there were so many issues with Dragon NaturallySpeaking.  When I was trying to use it before when I had upgraded to it from DNS 10.5.  And I realized that one of the main problems was that I was actually applying, specifically speaking, an upgrade to DNS 10.5.  I was not installing a cold version, meaning a clean version, meaning a start from zero version, of DNS 11.5.  I was installing an upgrade.

So consequently when I had done that the upgrade was actually modifying certain files that had already existed with 10.5.  Meaning DNS 10.5.  And as a result, as my system reports, or system updates, at the time, clearly showed.  I was having nothing but issues with DNS 11.5.  Which of course at that time was an upgrade.

So I'm sitting there.  And I'm having a cup of tea and I'm thinking.  And then I remembered that from this cold installation, meaning this installation from ground zero upward, that I had used that version for almost a solid year with virtually no problems whatsoever.  Of course until I downloaded IE 11.  At which point I had nothing but problems.

So again I'm just sitting there thinking about this.  And then I realized that in reality the DNS 11.5, from ground zero upward, build, would actually probably be the perfect solution.  And so I thought about that for a little bit longer.  And I decided to give it a try.

So the first thing I did was to save the profile for my DNS 10.5.  Which I did.  I exported it to a folder where I have my other profiles for DNS 12.  And then I completely removed everything from DNS 10.  Then I did a complete cleaning of the system to make sure there would be no remnants whatsoever.  So I was thinking that once I got DNS 11 on to the system.  I would be able to then import my profile from DNS 10 and then simply upgrade it to the new DNS 11.5.

And so, I then went ahead and I installed from the disk, DNS 11.5.  And the most amazing thing is that my original profile that I had with DNS 11.5, which actually was my original profile I had used.  When Aileen was dying, which had been DNS 10.5.  That profile is what came up automatically, for some reason, when I actually finished installing DNS 11.5.  And the significance of that profile is that it's the most accurate profile I ever created.

So as soon as I saw that.  Believe me.  It was like a very big lightbulb went off in my head.  So, I then immediately exported that profile so that I would make sure I had it.  And then I began to run some tests.  It absolutely works perfectly with IE 9.  In every single way.  And even though it's about 1 1/2 times larger as far as system memory and resources then DNS 10.5.  Because of how I have installed it.  The system is just behaving perfectly.  Which means of course that there is no way in the world that I am going to upgrade to IE 11.  That will just not happen.

So this is really just amazing news.  Because the real issue I began having who is IE was when I went to DNS 12.  Because IE 9.  And DNS 12 don't really have a match.  Which I've already shown a few times in some of my system updates.  And DNS 12 definitely does not have any kind of a match with IE 11.  Furthermore, DNS 11 actually still has the same issues that existed who is DNS prior to DNS 12, with Firefox, pursuant to the shockwave flash player.  Which is fine because I've already dedicated my system to IE 9 and Windows live writer, based on what I've been writing over the last several days in my system updates.

So this is just probably some of the best news I've had in a while.  Which is good because I've been looking at the air-quality reports this evening and I will do a separate Journal entry for them because they are really sort of incredible.

Plus I definitely am going to do a Journal entry before I go back to sleep about the Ebola situation because I'd rather talk about it.  Just a little bit more clearly.  The people at CNN are definitely some of the most intelligent people to listen to regarding the entire Ebola situation.  Dr. Gupta is by far one of the leading medical experts in this country.  I can say that with absolute confidence.  But my take on the entire Ebola and the bronchial infection situation is from a slightly different perspective.

So I do want to do a Journal entry on both of these things which I will do, like I said, before I go back to sleep.

But I definitely wanted to share this information because it's just absolutely unbelievably incredible.  I had no idea that my earlier profile which is actually one of the most accurate ones I ever created, was still on the system.  Which is just remarkable.  Because it's definitely going to make doing things a lot easier.  All I have to do is just do a little bit of training and it will be right up to speed.  So this is really unbelievably fantastic news.  This is going to give my hands a real rest.  And that's exactly what I need.

And I will also discuss that in this other Journal entry the I'm going to be doing regarding public health and personal health.

But I definitely wanted to share this information because I think it's very important especially for anyone who is using DNS whether they are using DNS 12 or 11.5 or even 10.5.  I think that sharing what I am experiencing regard to using DNS, Dragon NaturallySpeaking, is probably a very good idea.

But this also changes the entire mindset that I have regarding Windows 10.  Because DNS 13 is already out.  Which means DNS 13 is just not going to be concurrent with or have any real synchronicity with Windows 10.  Because Windows 10 has not been formally released.  So therefore DNS 13 has no basis on which to have any of the programming calls that will in fact be required in Windows 10.  So right off the bat for anyone who is using DNS 11.5 or 12 if they moved to Windows 10 the are probably going to have to purchase a completely new upgraded from Dragon NaturallySpeaking that will in fact have the programming calls necessary and the synchronicity necessary for Windows 10.  So right off the bat you're looking at $200 in addition to the price for the operating system of Windows 10.  Which of course then makes a very strong case for not upgrading from Windows 7.

And because Microsoft has made IE 11 In the Way that they did like I said with either DNS 11.5 or DNS 12.  There is basically no compatibility whatsoever or very little compatibility between DNS 11.5 or DNS 12 and IE 11.  There's just are showing no compatibility.  There are the very rudimentary programming calls that are able to be made with DNS 11.5.  And DNS 12 in IE 11.  But that's it.  There's just no linkage hardly at all.  So there's just no way in the world that I'm going to move over to IE 11 with either DNS 11.5 or DNS 12 unless Microsoft decides to change the formatting of IE 11 such that it will have a higher degree of compatibility with Dragon NaturallySpeaking.  And Microsoft is not seem disposed to do that.  All of which like I said before.  This makes a very strong case for staying exactly where I am.

So this news.  Like I said is really amazing news as far as my migrating upward to DNS 11.5.  Because it has actually proved to be an excellent choice.  It's just going to make doing things so much easier.

And I of course will write later.

I said good energy and high hopes for happiness, good health, and all good things always to everyone.

Blessed be.

The mind is like a book.  Opened and much is learned.  Closed and nothing is learned.  (Nicole Maschke, 1994)

Finding Balance

2:27 PM, EDT:

Everything is going to feel a lot better on Friday, well after Friday.  I mean, I know that one of the reasons I'm physically sluggishness.  I'm not exercising.  I know that for a fact.  But I can't exercise if I don't have a complete balanced diet.  Because it's just not a good idea to do that.  And I'm not going to have a balanced diet until after Friday.  So I'm just going to sort of coast along until Friday.  Because when that happens, everything will be back to normal.  I'll feel better I will be exercising so everything is going to feel a lot better.

It was all because of that one insurance payment.  I forgot the insurance payment meaning to make it in August.  So, I had a double payment in September.  And that pretty well toasted everything.  So it became a tougher month.  And that's all there is to it.  Nobody has everything they need at the end of the month.  It's just how things go.  And given the kind of news is going on with this virus is circulating was our children I'm sorry.  But I'm just not going to trust the medical community.  They don't even know what's going on.  They aren't even sure.  And that doesn't give me the kind of confidence that I want or the I believe I should have to go outside without wearing a breathing mask.  Because something is affecting those kids.  And whether we admit it now or not doesn't matter.  Because this cannot continue.

Every fall it's the same thing.  The kids go back to school and the kids bring home lots of bacteria.  And then families get sick.  And where I might be able to deal with that easier when I would be younger.  I certainly can't take that kind of risk anymore.  I mean, that's the truth.  When you get older like this.  You have to be a lot more careful about everything.  Not just physical things, but psychological things as well.  Normally when you are living with another person a roommate or a partner or a husband or wife.  You generally get the kind of heads-up, if you aren't performing psychologically or physically the way you normally would.  But I don't have that.  And so as a result.  I have to be a lot more careful.  And like I said, not just of the physical things, but psychological things as well.  It's not the way I want things it's just the way things are.  And there's no reason well, more than that.  There's no justification for me to go outside and do any kind of outside work on the house when my chemistry is not 100% where it needs to be.  And my chemistry isn't there only because I basically am running low on everything.  Which normally would not be the case.  But it is the case, because I missed that one insurance payment.  And that basically cut me a little short for the month.  Which is okay.  I'm still getting through.  It's only going to be two days.  Well about that.  Because I have a number of different sources online, where I can purchase everything I need.  And I also have two backup plans in case any of these things fall through.

So I'm all set for the beginning of the month.  And I have reorganized as I said, how I handle the paperwork that I get.  And on Friday morning, I have this interview for a review for my qualifications for food stamps.  But because I only get $15.  And because it actually costs the state of Ohio over $100 to give me that $15.  And because I don't really have any way of using the $15 because I can't really go anywhere.  Because if I were to go somewhere I'd have to get some money in order to be able to pay the driver would take me someplace.  And that means that I would have to spend four dollars to get two dollars out of the machine.  Plus, I would have to spend two dollars for the trip.  Because it's a dollar each way.  So that basically is about nine dollars, which then cuts down the amount of money I actually get from the food stamps from $15 down to about six dollars.  And that just doesn't make any kind of economic sense.

So I'm planning on telling my caseworker that I would prefer for the state of Ohio to please keep the $15 M. not give me the $15.  Because there's no real point in me having the $15 when I can't use it anywhere and it's not enough money for me to hardly buy anything anyhow.  I mean, if I were getting more money and stamps than just $15 I might actually consider using the $15 for food stamps.  But given the fact that it's only $15 with all the other costs involved in having to use the $15.  It's basically rather foolish to try and use the $15 when it's going to cost me almost 9 dollars just to use the card.  Not to mention the fact that it's costing the state of Ohio over $100 to allocate that $15 to me.  That doesn't make a lot of sense.

I would rather have the state of Ohio keep the $15 then spend over $100 just to give me $15.

So, come Friday I will have everything I need and everything will move forward and I will begin to feel a lot better.  And I'm purposely not mentioning where I am getting anything to anyone at all.  At least not yet.  Because I know there are people in this world who have nothing but hatred for me for whatever reason.  So I'm not going to mention where I get anything or how I'm doing what I'm doing along those lines until I've seen everything take place for at least a few months.  To make sure that no one is going to attempt to tamper with my ability to take care of myself.

Once I have that assurance.  Then I definitely will be sharing where I'm getting things from.  Especially as they prove to be reliable.

So that's about the way things are.

My idea about using Internet Explorer in terms of Windows instead of using Internet Explorer in terms of tabs is sort of an okay idea.  There's not much difference.  It's just a little easier to control things.  But not necessarily.  It's just an experiment.  The only thing that's impeding me from doing more right now literally is just my energy.  And that's just because my chemicals are not as balanced as I would like them to be.  And they aren't because again like I said it's the end of the month and I'm just running a little short on things.  Which is perfectly normal.  And it's definitely not a big deal.

And as far as Windows updates.  I have no idea why the DVD update from Microsoft caused my system to stall out.  When it was trying to reboot.  The only indication I have is that there may have been something going on between how the hard drive was is bonding to the CD-ROM, based on my selection in the setup menu for my machine, whereby I had selected for the hard drive and its acoustics to be handled more along lines of what the manufacturer might suggest.  Rather than to simply select the other option we choose to bypass.  Meaning, not to have the hard drive running in accordance with how the manufacturer might suggest.  But to have the hard drive actually respond more in terms of how the machine was and is set up.

Because once I did that.  The DVD update from Microsoft had no problem whatsoever going through.  But it does make me wonder about some of these updates that Microsoft sends.  I have already selected the options so that any update from Microsoft needs my approval before I will even download the update or install the update.

As far as Windows 10 is concerned.  I am having a wait-and-see attitude.  Because as I said before.  There are a lot of businesses in this country right now, who are actually still using Windows XP and doing so without any problem whatsoever.  And I very well may end up doing the same thing with Windows 7.  Because I don't have any problem with the websites that I go to what I use.  And I don't have any problem getting the work done.  That I need to get done.  Because my life isn't really that critical.  I don't need to have every update.

But at the same time, if I find that Windows 10 can actually be installed on my machine and it's not really that expensive.  Then, like I said I'm going to have a kind of wait and see attitude.  Because if it's really not going to negatively impact my machine and if it's not going to cost me lots and lots of money.  And of it's not going to have me spending extra money for new software and that kind of thing.  Then I might consider doing it.  But the early reports are that Microsoft is at the very least, discouraging third-party software makers or programmers.  Because the early notes I've read on Windows 10 indicate that third-party programmers or software makers won't even be allowed to start making software or programs for Windows 10 until after Windows 10 has actually been in the market for all a while.  And then they have to actually offer their software, at least for inspection or to be included with the software that Microsoft would then be offering him.  What is called, the Microsoft store.

And then of course is a kind of competition with the Google applications store.  But again, that's something that I've don't really enjoy.  I don't like that.  The only thing that's happening because of this ongoing war between Google and Microsoft is that the users meaning us, are pretty much caught in the middle.  And I don't think it's a good idea for the software companies to be jacking around.  The user.  There are a lot of people who are out of work.  There are a lot of people who are having trouble making ends meet because things are getting more expensive.  There are literally tons and tons of people who are having extra medical costs because of disease or illness.  And I don't think from a marketing standpoint that when you have your customer base.  Having this degree of difficulty that it's a good idea to go to your customer base and basically ask for more money.  That generally doesn't win you a lot of favor with your customers.

And we know that's true, from looking at what happened with Windows Vista.  We also know that's true with what happened with Windows 8.  Microsoft just doesn't seem to want to pay attention.  Like they always know more than everyone else.

So as far as Windows 10 is concern like I said, I am going to have a wait and see attitude.

And once again, I really would like to be working on my petitions more and writing more but my body just feels a little bit below par.  It's not a big deal.  And it's not going to last.  As I've said before, Friday, everything will get back to normal.  At least until the Republicans and the tea party Kerry through with their threat to shut down the government.  Because they are absolutely going to do that.  They have already made plans to do so.  They've already made plans to do that if they don't win the Senate.  They already have teams of lawyers all over the country ready to go into action and to fight any election, where they are losing.  Because that's what they intend on doing.  Because they know that if they take the results of any election into court that they can actually win the case because they have either paid off the judge or they have paid off the court.  So, they have lots and lots of lawyers ready to go into action.  In case they lose any election that they are in.

Because that's how they operate.  They don't like playing fair they don't believe in playing fair.  They don't like being honest.  All they care about is getting their way.  And that's sad.  But for my part it basically means I can't in any way count on having any money coming to me in November.  Because the Republican Party are ready hates everyone who is poor, and they definitely hate everyone who's on disability and they definitely are blaming the poor for every bit of monetary problem or all the monetary problems in the country.  Even though for example in my case, the state of Ohio is paying out over $100 or spending $100 in order to give me $15.  So when the Republican Party in Ohio wants to complain about the poor being the problem of why the government is out of money.  My answer usually can very well be, that it's not the problem of the poor.  It's the problem of the Gov. of the state of Ohio and the Republicans in the state legislature who are allocating $100 to pay me $15 in food stamps.  That's a sickly really stupid economics.  I mean, that's so stupid that anybody in first year economics going to college can see that.

So based on how angry and mean and hateful.  The Republicans really are.  I can plan on Friday.  But I can't make any plans after Friday.  At least as far as my disability, because there's no assurance that it's going to be there.  They could've there's any way that the tea party and the Republican Party can take more money away from the poor and to hurt us in any way possible.  They will do that.  They won't hesitate they won't even think about it.  Because they have so much hatred for people who are poor and who are disabled that they just can't even hardly stand it.  The tea party and the Republican Party actually get a lot of emotional and psychological pleasure and joy by hurting people who are disabled or people who have terminal illnesses or people who are mentally ill or people who depend on Social Security.  The Republican Party and the tea party really get a lot of joy out of making people suffer making many women have to eat dog food.  The Republican Party like seeing old women and old men eating dog food.  While they Republican Party get everything they want they really enjoy that.  Because if they didn't then their voting record would reflect that and it does not.

So that's just how things are.  I can never make plans beyond one month in advance.  And I can never actually trust in any way that my disability check will be there until it is actually there.  Because the Republican Party is going to do anything they can to hurt people in this country because they enjoy hurting Americans they enjoy hurting people.  One very clear example of that is how the Republican Party and the right wing Christian conservative extremists in Denver Colorado are treating those children in high school by basically trying to tell them that they are not allowed to learn about conscientious objection.  That is unconscionable.  That's one of the most blatant displays of cultural stupidity I have seen in recent memory.

So life is getting a lot tougher and not just for me.  The most interesting thing I saw in that I see in any of the pictures of what's going on in Hong Kong with these extremely courageous protests that are taking place.  The most amazing thing I am saying is that everyone is wearing a face mask.  Not because they are trying to hide their identity but because of breathing issues.  And I've talked to people in the area, meaning people who live in Asia.  Either just on the phone or in e-mail.  And from what I have been told a lot of the reasons that people wear breathing masks in that part of the country is partially because of the obvious reason of pollution.  But also because of the amount of disease and viruses that are so prevalent in that area.

And if we in the United States don't wise up to that, then we are just not paying attention.  Because having a case of Ebola present itself.  The United States out of nowhere, should definitely be a wake-up call to every medical community in this country.  Because we don't have any idea at this point, who that person who had Ebola came in contact with.  And I'm just looking at the news right now, and it says right here in the very first news story that the Texas Ebola patient had contact with children.  That should definitely be a complete fire alarm going off.  And it doesn't matter that the children are being monitored because that's what it says.  Because those children are obviously coming in contact with other people.  This is where they are making a mistake because it says in the article that the children are being monitored at home.  And that is a mistake.  Because if this person who had Ebola came in contact with those children those children should be in isolation.  And not just the children who came in contact with the individual should be monitored, but everyone in that school needs to be looked at.  And it also says that when the man walked into the emergency room that not all the information was fully communicated.  And then he left the hospital.  That's a breakdown in medical procedure right there.  And it says in the article that it's possible that others were infected because of the laps absolutely right.  And it says that people are only going to get Ebola through contact with body fluids.  And yet I don't know completely that that's true.  Because we don't know what this man did or what he was involved with.  Now it says that the CDC is ramping up efforts to deal nationally with the spread of Ebola.  We will see what they do.  Because this could turn into a really serious situation.  Nobody knows exactly what happened.  And what's interesting is that this is happening on Rick Perry's watch.

I mean here he is the governor of the state and out of all the states in this country.  It happens in Texas where Rick Perry is the governor where there is a man who is diagnosed with the most deadly disease known to man.  Known to humankind.  And here we have another situation.

In Rhode Island that child who was suffering from the virus, D. 68, has died.  That's not a good sign.  And even know the Department of Health in Rhode Island is saying that most of the people generally have minor symptoms or minor flu symptoms.  It also says it is unclear what role the virus played in the child's death.  The key word is unclear.  And also says that this year D. 68, has been sending more children than usual to the hospital with severe respiratory illnesses.  It says that it's affecting children of the most part who have a history of asthma or other breathing problems.  That to me says there's something wrong or there's something in the air that is facilitating this.  It also says that the virus may also be linked to a small number of cases of a mysterious neurological illness seen in Colorado Boston and Michigan.  And that this weakness of central nerve dysfunction and abnormal aspects to the spinal brain matter.  Meaning possible limb dysfunction.

So given this kind of thing.  I'm not real interested or willing to take the kind of risk of going outside without a breathing mask.  And I have to correct myself, because now I'm looking at a picture of these courageous protesters in Hong Kong and none of them are wearing breathing masks.  So that's basically a correction that I need to make.  But with these two conditions of Ebola and this other virus that's going around.  Believe me it just does not make any sense whatsoever for me to go out without a breathing mask.

I'm just reading this article about all of the influx of people moving to Texas.  And I mean, it is a nightmare.  As a matter of fact, I'm going to send this article to myself.  So that I can include this article specifically in my Journal.  Because you've got to see this.  I mean, it's absolutely unbelievable the amount of problems that people are going to face.  If they moved to Texas.  Everything from water problems to problems with the school system to longer commutes.  It's a real nightmare.

And this is another sign of the times.  And I'm going to send this article to myself because I want to include it in the Journal.  This absolutely should wake everyone up.  This is just unbelievable.  It says that 35,000 walruses have basically gone up onto a beach in Alaska.  And that this is actually due to dwindling Arctic ice.  And of course, the Republicans are all in favor of sucking the planet dry.  Meaning, sucking the life out of the planet with more oil exploration because they want that money.  And there are a lot of negative results as a result of what is happening.  Whether we like it or not there are ramifications from what we are doing.

This is disturbing news.  And then it says of course Julia Pierson director of the US Secret Service has resigned.  And I'm not real surprised with that.  Because of that individual who is able to make it inside the White House.  But that's nothing compared to this bronchial virus and Ebola.  Absolutely.  Those things should definitely have people taking a very careful look.  Now, what I'm looking closer at the national news I see that it's not just one person who has died of D. 86.  It's three people who have died from this virus.  I'm telling you, this is a real wake-up call.  If you have a child in school and if that child has any kind of reading issues I am telling you the child should be wearing a breathing mask.  That's what I would do if I have a young child at this point.

I mean the world is dangerous enough as it is.  And now with this D. 86 virus and Ebola the world is just getting one hell of a lot more dangerous.  And then there's another article here is talking about how lakes are drying up.  This is all over the world.  But that doesn't matter.  I mean, what more do we need in order to pay attention?

I mean, one of the reasons I have survived for as long as I have and done as well as I have over the years is because for one I pay attention.  I pay attention to everything.  I've had to because I've lived with hypoglycemia most of my life.  And in addition.  I've lived with this spinal condition ever since I was 19.  So I've had to pay attention to everything.  It's just the way my life has been.  But additionally, I spent a lot of times in a lot of different forests here in the United States.  All over the country.  I've been in the woods in the dead of night without any flashlight and have been able to make my way through the woods without any problem.  I also spent over a week in the woods alone when I was younger.  As a kind of test to see whether or not I could actually live in the week for that long on just or with just, a sleeping bag a pocket knife and a tarp.  Which is exactly what I did.  So those things in addition to the fact that I've never done anything other than marijuana a few times when I was a kid.  Other than that.  I don't drink, I don't take drugs I don't take any prescription medication.  I don't put anything into my body that I don't know exactly what it will do.  And I also know how to get the hell out of the way.  When I see danger coming.

And that's what I am trying to pass on in this Journal entry.  There's nothing unusual about me being as healthy or is physically fit as I am.  And the only reason I say, that is because I haven't done anything to my body that would actually promote some of the problems in so many other people are having.  The use of prescription medication in the United States is absolutely skyrocketing.  Drug addiction is off the charts.  Alcoholism is a huge problem of obesity is absolutely beyond comprehension.  And unless you actually have been really athletic when you were younger and I don't mean playing football.  I mean aerobic athletics or things like long distance running or bicycling.  Things were you are really having to pump your heart.  Unless you've done that when you get older, you basically aren't going to know what to do in order to get back to that state of health.

I know exactly what to do.  For example, I haven't really done any kind of aerobic exercise for over a year.  And so that when I do begin to do exercise again.  The key thing to remember is to go slow.  Go slow.  There are not going to be any awards for going fast.  So, in October when I begin to do push-ups and when I began to do deep knee bends.  I will probably start with perhaps doing five.  And then I will do that for at least two weeks.  Before I go any further.  And the same is when I get my stationary bicycle.  I won't be doing any kind of heavy exercise on the bicycle more than perhaps five minutes.  Regardless of how good or bad, I might feel.  Because as I've said before, there is a very important thing to remember about your heart.

As you exercise your heart actually builds muscle around the heart.  Then when you stop exercising, that muscle that is around the heart doesn't go away.  It turns into fat.  So that when you begin exercising again your heart has to work not only for the exercise you are doing, but it has to work harder in a way, to convert all that fat around the heart back into muscle.  And that takes longer.  And it's a more difficult thing to do.  You can actually drop dead literally.  You can drop dead by trying to do too much exercise to quickly.  You have to go slow.

And when you live with hypoglycemia like I do.  You have to regardless of anything you might feel or want.  You have to live by the 60/40 rule.  Meaning 60% protein, compared to or in combination with, 40% carbohydrates.  If you stay to the 60/40 rule throughout your life.  And you have hypoglycemia, the chances of you becoming diabetic go down dramatically.  And your health actually increases and so does your metabolism.

So, for example, at this point in the month where I'm basically a day in a half away from actually getting back on a better diet and getting the vitamins I need on a daily basis.  My attitude is to go slow.  Not to press my body not to press my mind.  In other words don't push.  You have to do that.  You have to know when to bear down and when not to.  And when you see things in a country like water shortages.  And an unknown virus basically killing our children.  Along with Ebola.  You either start paying attention, or you end up having real problems.  And I'm telling you.  There are a lot of wake-up calls right now going on.  Those walruses on the Alaska beach, should definitely serve as a huge wake-up call.  Because that is a migratory change.  And that's a really significant migratory change.  And it's being done because the Republican Party and the Koch brothers and these other wealthy people basically don't care about sucking the life out of this planet as much as they care about getting their money.  And the ramifications of what's being done are going to be so very serious that humanity's chance for survival is going to decrease proportionately.

And this flu season is going to be literally one of the worst.  I can tell you that already.  My instincts are telling me that.  And the same thing is true with me walking long distances.  It's not my muscles.  My muscles are definitely strong enough for me to walk.  Not just three or 4 miles but five and 6 miles.  My muscles are incredibly strong and I am very strong I am in extremely good health for someone my age.  The problem is that I have done so much walking in my life.  And I have done walking on extremely rough terrain so much in my life from such an early age and in addition been a long-distance runner for a number of years.  That my bones, in conjunction with, and partially as a result of, my operation in 1968, basically have a certain degree of trauma associated with my bones.  Meaning my bones are about 25 or 30 years older than the rest of my body.  So while my bones are incredibly strong, which they are.  I also have lots and lots of broken and torn nerves all over my body.  So consequently I have issues with circulation in my lower legs.  Which is why I keep my legs elevated quite a bit.

And that's also why I'm going to begin to get back into an exercise routine starting in October.  And I'm doing that partially so that in December.  And then in January specifically, when I actually am able to purchase a stationary bicycle for the house.  I will have already been doing exercise every day for a number of months so that getting on the bicycle will be a lot easier on my heart because I will have already been doing semi-aerobic exercise every day.  Prior to getting on the bicycle.  Which means I'm going to do better.  And I will be healthier.  Because it's not about building muscle at my age.  If you try to build muscle when you are my age that is a mistake area because you will be going to far, and doing too much.  You don't want to do that.  The last thing in the world you want to do is build big huge muscles when you are in your 60s approaching 70.  That's the last thing in the world you want to do.  Because by doing that you are increasing your body mass somewhat disproportionately in relation to any skeletal problems you may be having whereby the increased body mass will actually put more stress on your skeleton.

So as you get older, what you really want to do is to do more aerobic exercise in one way or another in order to maintain overall tone.  Because that's how you actually will maintain better health as you get older.  Building body mass is not what you want to do.  It's true that when you get older, if you begin to lose weight, either because of drug addiction or lifestyle change that the decreased weight actually can make things a little tougher for you healthwise.  Because it's always a good idea to have a little extra weight on your body as you get older.  And I don't mean overweight, but to have just a little bit of extra weight a little bit of bulk.  But more than anything when you get older, what you really need to do is to tone up.  That is the biggest thing you can do.  I have a 20 pound dumbbell.  And I plan on beginning to use that dumbbell next month.  But I have to be sitting down when I do so.  Because of my hernia.  But doing that and only doing one or two specific types of exercise with it will in fact increase a lot of my upper body strength.  And I will do that in conjunction with the other exercising I plan on doing.  All geared toward toning up.

And as far as my diet again.  I'm hypoglycemic.  So I don't really eat out of hunger.  I only eat when my sugar levels begin to drop.  And so consequently, when I eat anything I'm always thinking in terms of the 60/40 rule.  And as any doctor will tell you, any doctor that has ever seen me physically they will tell you point blank that it has been my diligence at sticking with the 60/40 rule that has kept me from going diabetic.

So again when I'm looking outside or looking at the news.  And I see a bronchial infection that is killing children.  And then I also see Ebola in the United States.  And I see all these mistakes that people are making with the Ebola disease, which actually they did in Texas.  That is not a good sign.  I mean, that is definitely a fire alarm going off.  It absolutely has to be.  Because you are talking about children.  And if they are only watching a certain number of the children.  Then they are not watching everything they need to be looking at.  As I said prior to taking care of my darling, Aileen I took two different courses in infection control.  And the mistakes that were made in the emergency room in Texas with the Ebola patient are definitely right out of the infection control manual.  They should never have let him leave that hospital.

So there are a lot of things going on in this country right now.  Just like I said here in the United States alone, that should definitely serve as a wake-up call.

And if anyone thinks I'm not embarrassed because of this really what I consider, Donna allergy to various pollutants in the air.  Then they basically don't know me.  Because I definitely think that this reaction I have two certain pollutants is at the most, silly.  But it is just what is happening.  And it's the same thing that happened in 1968.  And I didn't notice any of this until I had been out walking on certain days when the pollution levels were accelerated or elevated.  And then I didn't really notice anything in my breathing as much as I noticed it in my inner ear.  And then I began looking at things here in the home.  Which is why I cleaned out the entire heating vent.  And I made it so that the cats can't get anywhere near that heating vent again.  And it's also why in October I'm going to be purchasing another of these specialized heating filters.  They are called micron filters.  And they are some of the best heating filters around, and they don't really cost that much.  I think a package of 10 costs like $20.  Or perhaps it's a package of like six that costs $20.  I think that's more correct.  But would these micron filters they actually filter out every single bit of anything including animal dander.  And even dead skin floating in the air.  They filter everything out.

And the dust devil is absolutely perfect because it literally keeps everything clean in this house.  It is one of the best things I could have ever done.

So everything is moving forward.  And so am I.  And my decision was Internet Explorer is just perfect.  Going back to DNS 10 and IE 9 was the best choice I ever made.  It really was.  Everything is running so much more stable.  Everything is so much easier to use.  DNS 12 is a very good program.  It's a really good issue of DNS.  But DNS 10 uses one half the memory actually even less.  DNS 10 actually uses about one third of the memory and system resources that DNS 12 uses.  And on my system with everything I have running.  That is substantial.  And like you said, the only workaround I have to deal with it is that the context menus may not actually be picked up as well with DNS 10.  As with DNS 11 or 12.  But DNS 11 and 12 use a lot more memory and system resources.  Which makes it a lot harder for me to use those programs on my system because I have so many different things going on my system at any one time.

And I realize this article or this Journal entry is very long, but there's been a lot that I've been looking at I'm talking about the think is really important that I want to put into this Journal entry.  I just have a lot on my mind.  And seeing the headlines like I did.  That's just beyond description.  I mean, that's just amazing.  Three children dying from this bronchial infection is not a good sign.  If the medical communities in the United States aren't taking notice of this they are making a big mistake.  Because this should be a definite signal about how the flu season this year is going to unfold.

I like I said, that doesn't even come close to dealing with what the Ebola disease may actually do in the United States.  I mean, that could actually end up mushrooming into something terrible.  Now on the good side.  Apparently, and I use that word very carefully, there are medications that have been experimental.  And according to what I've read so far in the news.  Some of these medications have proven effective.  But I'm not sure about that.  So that's something I need to take another look at as far as the medical reports that I periodically review.

But I can't do any of that until after I get paid and after I get my diet back on track and my chemistry balanced.  There's just no way.  Because I can't focus intellectually the way I want to.  Because my sugar level is somewhat in a state of flux.  And this has to do more with my electrolytes.  Because that's something that is a side effect of hypoglycemic shock.  When you are going into low blood sugar.  When you are hypoglycemic.  And when you are doing so repeatedly, one of the things that actually takes place in your body is that your electrolytes can actually become somewhat depleted or out of balance.  So it's not just following simply the 60/40 rule.  The reason why the 60/40 rule is important is because the 60% amount of protein that you take in will of course cause your pancreas to basically stop being hysterical and dumping the sugar.  But the carbohydrates actually not only work as a kind of stimulant to the pancreas but they also bring up the levels of your electrolytes and balance your electrolytes.  So that's why the 60/40 rule is so important.  Because just putting the protein and to stabilize the pancreas may in fact of course bring your sugar levels back up where you are not in hypoglycemic shock.  But the carbohydrates that you have with the protein then work on the rest of your body chemistry to bring the electrolytes back into balance.

And so that's why right now trying to do too much is a bad idea.  And all I have to do is get through tomorrow.  That's all I have to do.  And I know how to do that.  And one of the ways is by doing as little as possible.  Not pushing myself not stressing out.  Just taking things nice and slow.  Because that's what you have to do.  Whether you are hypoglycemic or whether you are at work or living in the woods or doing whatever job you do.  You have to know when to go a little faster and when to slow down.

So, for example, tonight I will probably have another bowl of rice.  But tonight I won't have any mayonnaise with Darius.  I will just have butter and salt.  I might actually and I know this sounds funny.  But I might actually makes a little applesauce and with the rice.  Don't even ask me why.  It's just a kind of gut feeling.  Because applesauce has so many different benefits.  Because apples really do have tremendous amounts of benefits to the system and especially to the electrolytes.  So that's exactly what I might do.  Because like I said, all I have to do is get through tomorrow.  And I can definitely do that.  Because once Friday Commons everything will be a completely different story.

And I've been trying to trim the cats but have been having difficulty in doing so.  So, God willing, if they are still healthy and still with me, which I believe they will be.  After January I'm actually going to try to have some kind of grooming service, and pick them up and do the grooming on them either here in the house or wherever they take them.  I can't make any excuses because I don't have any.  The only thing I can say is that the arthritis of my hand and not having the ability to brush them the way that I would like to has aggravated the situation.  But they are clean and they are happy.  You have seen pictures of them.  They are all content.  They have enough food to get through tomorrow.  And then in October everything will be different.  Everything will be much better.

Because like I said having the things delivered means I will be able to have the ability to buy in larger quantities.  So I can buy a very large bag of dried cat food.  And I can buy a much larger bag of cat litter.  Something I would not normally be able to carry for a very long distance especially in the shopping cart walking.  All that distance.  So everything is going to be completely different and much much better.

And trust me.  I'm definitely frustrated that I'm not doing more as far as petitions or the news.  I'm very frustrated about it.  But I have to maintain an even keel.  I just have to take it slow for just one more day.  And that's what I'm doing.

So life goes on.  And I will absolutely undoubtedly write later.  Right now, I think all I'm going to do is relax and play a little solitaire.  As I said earlier, DirecTV actually added some channels to the package that I purchased from DirecTV and that's really fantastic because it gives me more movie channels to be able to watch.  And I really like that.

I don't want anyone thinking I don't like any of the newscasters in Cleveland because that's not true.  I don't have any issue with any of them.  Because I hardly know any of them.  I just don't like a lot of commercial TV because I don't like a lot of the commercials.  And I specifically don't like commercials playing in the background when I'm trying to sleep because I don't like that extra information going into my brain when I'm not conscious.  I just don't think that's a really good idea.

So, I absolutely will write later I mean, this is October and that's a tough months.  Emotionally it's just a very tough month.  That's one of the reasons I'm going to be doing more exercise.  Because I want to fight back.  And I know I have to.  So that's what I will do.

The movie 9 to 5 just came on.  And I really love this movie.  These three movie stars, Dolly Parton, Jane Fonda, and Lily Tomlin I just hysterical.  I mean, they are great.  And Aileen and I used to love this film.  But it's not one of those films that is difficult for me to watch.  There are films that Aileen used to love that are hard for me to watch.  This is not one of them.  And it's definitely a chick flick.  But so what.  I don't care.  And again once I get my diet back and my sugar levels and my like a light levels are back I'm definitely going to take a shower I will clean out everything will get back to normal.  I have already put new sheets on the chair where I sit and sleep.  I have been taking standing baths.  And what those are is where you basically just scrub down when you are by the sink.  So I have been keeping things clean and changing clothes and so forth.  I just haven't felt comfortable about getting in the shower.  Because doing so actually uses a certain amount of my blood sugar because of the stress of the shower.

So again when things are like this.  I just go slowly.

So with that in mind, I think I will call it basically a night.  At least for now.  I will write later.  I'm sure of it.  I always do.

And I don't know about tomorrow.  I'll have to see how I feel.  Generally I have a little bit of nervousness before the day I actually get my check because I never really know if I will actually get my check or not.  And part of that is because I just don't really know if the Republicans are going to do something to try to stop me from getting my check.  Because I know that if they can try to hurt anyone that's exactly what they will do because they really enjoy hurting people.  So I never take anything for granted.  But the people at my bank are absolutely wonderful people in every way.  Regardless of any criteria they are just really very kind and very good people.

So none of this is a reflection on them of all.

But I will write later.

I send good energy and high hopes for happiness, good health, and all good things always to everyone.

Blessed be.

The mind is like a book.  Opened and much is learned.  Closed and nothing is learned.  (Nicole Maschke,).

In the Slow Lane

1:19 PM, EDT:

As I said this morning, things are just willing of of the slowly.  It's the end of the month and I was able to do a certain amount of dishes today.  Not as many as I would've liked.  And because it's partially of the weather and partly the time of the year.  And just partially physical things going on.  I'm going to take a break for a while.  And then I will come back and do some more work.

I'll write later.

End Silent Lunches at Elementary School - ForceChange


End Silent Lunches at Elementary School - ForceChange

11:58 AM, EDT:

This ladies and gentlemen is an example of Christian conservative extremists thinking.  That's exactly what it is.  We have here an example of right wing extremist thinking where as far as these individuals are concerned.  Children need to be controlled and not allowed to be children.  This is exactly what's happening in Denver Colorado where the right wing Christian extremists are so hysterical that they want their children to be as stupid as possible, and they don't want their children under any circumstances, questioning authority.  They don't want their children under any circumstances doing anything other than simply learning how to do a job and then putting up and shutting up and doing exactly what they are told to do.  Meaning that the right wing Christian conservative extremists of the United States don't want adults.  Meaning children growing into adults with anything on their minds other than to simply be blindly obedient and do exactly what they are told never to have any original thinking never to do any kind of discovery never to want anything other than what they are told to want never to go to sleep other than when they are told to go to sleep or to wake up only to where what they are told to wear only to believe what they are told to believe only to feel what they are told to feel and to be controlled in every single way so that the right wing Christian conservative extremists will then be able to say that they are in control that they are the ones who are running not only their own lives, but the lives of every single other person within their sphere of control.

And that kind of behavior has not been seen since World War II under Adolf Hitler.

And if that's the kind of world you want then you probably will not support this petition.  But if you believe as I do that the greatest asset to humanity is our inspirational instantaneous creative discovery.  The fact that we humans invent and create thanks.  And if you celebrate that creativity and if you celebrate that invention and you celebrate the inventive creativeness of humanity then you will of course believe as I do that this particular notion at this school is absolutely the wrong kind of message to send to our children and the wrong kind of control to apply to our children.

Of course this is just my Journal.  These are just my opinions.  I'm not the final answer on anything.  All I know is that my daughter, who is 35 is extremely creative very intelligent and is truly a very free soul and celebrates her intelligence.  And she didn't get that way by me putting lots and lots of rules on top of her and trying to control the way she thinks or the way she acts or behave.  She got that way by me allowing her to discover within herself all the various aspects of creativity that she has and to exercise that creativity.

So I can't tell anyone what to do.  I don't even want to.  But I sincerely think that this is really ugly behavior.  And it's just another sign of how absolutely hysterically insecure these right wing Christian conservative extremists really are.  They are so desperate to control everything that one begins to believe that they really even want to control God.  I mean, they want to control everything else.  What's going to happen if they end up getting their way and they control everything in the entire world and then we have nothing more than a world like the book, 1984?  What are they going to do then?  And what's going to happen to humanity's creativity if we suddenly just turned our back on the creative inspirational instantaneous discovery that we have within ourselves, which is in fact, the basis of all creative endeavors, whether it is carpentry or plumbing or music or film or writing?  What's going to happen, then?

I'm certainly glad I don't have a young child growing up right now.  Because I know that if that were the case and I did have a young child in school and they were being subjected to this kind of behavior by the teacher that the teacher and the administrators would not be talking to me they would be talking to my lawyers.

For the sake of our children and for the sake of our future I hope you will sincerely support and sign this petition.

Thank you.

System Update: Comprehensive

11:34 AM, EDT:

Windows 7:

At 10:30 AM, I downloaded an update from Microsoft.  And before it did so I inspected the update and it talked about how the update was going to improve DVD performance using Windows media player.  So I initially thought that this was a good idea.  And that there was no problem in doing this.  And for the most part, I was correct.  The sequences of events that follows is what happened as a result of installing that update.

10:32 AM: rebooting.
10:34 AM: system is stuck.
10:35 AM: system is still stuck.
10:36 AM: system is accelerating.
10:37 AM: attempted to enter the safe mode.
10:39 AM: safe mode is initiating.
10:41 AM: safe mode is loading.
10:42 AM: safe mode is still loading.
10:51 AM: safe mode is still loading, a pierced to be hanging.
10:53 AM: rebooting and entering set up.
10:53 AM: setting drive acoustics to bypass.
10:53 AM: rebooting.
10:54 AM: still rebooting.
10:55 AM: still rebooting.
10:56 AM: still rebooting.
10:57 AM: still rebooting.
10:58 AM: booting from a system disk.
11:04 AM: beginning system restore.
11:07 AM: system restore reports disk errors.
11:07 AM: starting disk repairs.
11:14 AM: repairs completed.
11:14 AM: rebooting.
11:15 AM: entering set up to insure that drive acoustics are set to bypass.
11:18 AM: rebooting.
11:19 AM: system loading.
11:20 AM: system loaded, checking Windows update.  The recent update has been installed.
11:21 AM: system is secure.
11:22 AM: changed the Internet options for Internet Explorer not to use tabs.
11:23 AM: loading major programs.
11:32 AM: all programs loaded.

Now basically what this means is that the update that Windows was sending through was sent through in such a way so that when I hand, and set up or the machine, the drive meaning hard drive, acoustics, set for what I had which was suggested.  Meaning that the acoustics of the hard drive for my machine would actually perform pursuant to the suggested specifications for the hard drive.  However, that proved to be a mistake.  Because the update from Windows where it is actually improving the performance of the hard drive.  Evidently is sending through or has sent through specifications to the hard drive and to the CD-ROM whereby those specifications or those modifications to the way that the CD-ROM would in fact behavior became somewhat in conflict with the suggested specifications for the acoustics of the hard drive.

So, by bypassing the suggested in any of the other specifications for how the hard drive might perform, regarding acoustics.  I therefore was able to then remove any of the machine language going to the hard drive that might actually interfere with the update.  As a result of machines started fine.

Now the point in presenting this is because for anyone who has a Dell XPS 410 you might want to unless you have replaced your hard drive, two the bypass option for the acoustics of your hard drive if you are downloading this update regarding DVD performance from Windows.  Meaning from Microsoft.  And the reason for that is because of everything I just basically presented.  Obviously there is an issue with the DVD update from Microsoft and your hard drive in the Dell XPS 410, if in fact, you have selected in your Dell XPS 410 to have the hard drive perform pursuant to manufacturer specifications or in the suggested mode.

The fact that the system on during the initialization of the safe mode or well may have been doing rather than anything wrong with the machine.  But there is a chance that when the update was downloaded, that the bootstrap sequence could have been corrupted because that's basically what system repair found.  And that could have happened because there was another update actually taking place at the same time.  Which is no big deal.

Internet Explorer:

I made the change to set up Internet explorer to operate on a pure Windows bases rather than using tabs because with Dragon NaturallySpeaking can, meaning DNS 10, accessing the context menus doesn't really work that well if at all.  So consequently, the workaround to that is to use multiple windows for Internet Explorer rather than to use the context menu because in that way then you don't have to really worry about trying to access the context menus when it's not really going to work.  So the workaround of course is to use multiple windows rather than to use multiple tabs.  This is only an experiment.  I may in fact go back to using tabbed browsing, but at least at this point I'm going to use multiple windows instead.

Depending on how this test goes and what I find I will of course make another report.

In any event, selecting the bypass option for drive acoustics in the setup menu for my machine has actually quieted down the hard drive to a certain degree.  And furthermore, it is actually then causing the hard drive to be more consistent with whatever the programming manipulations that are being made or have been made by the DVD update from Microsoft.

I'll write later.

Provide Homeless Children with Shelter - ForceChange


Provide Homeless Children with Shelter - ForceChange

10:06 AM, EDT:

So I'm wondering, why is this even a petition?  I mean when you consider that the United States is 78% Christian.  And that means that 78% of the people in the United States follow or at least claim to follow the teachings of Jesus Christ.  And then when you consider that every single Christian Bible and Catholic Bible ever written.  That says very clearly that Jesus died on the cross meaning he was crucified on the cross for protecting women and children.  So if that's true that the Lord and Savior of the Christians in the Catholics died on the cross protecting children.  Then why is this a petition?

I mean, what excuse do we have as a nation for even allowing children to suffer the way that this petition is describing?  How can we do that?

Let's also consider the fact that Mohammed and Buddha and Moses were very much if not very much alike.  As far as Jesus Christ.  Because Mohammed and Buddha and Moses all died living lives of poverty.  They all died being pacifists.  And they all died protecting women and children.  So that means that in a nation like the United States where everyone is either a Muslim or Catholic or Christian or Jew or a Buddhist or they are Wiccan or pagan or even atheist.  It doesn't matter.  In a nation where so many people are claiming to value life then why and fact is this a petition?

If we ignore this petition if we ignore these children them.  We are really ignoring ourselves and our future.

Please support & this measure.

Thank you.

Stop Dropping Live Turkeys from Planes


Stop Dropping Live Turkeys from Planes

9:08 AM, EDT:

People think that I'm strange or perhaps that I'm not really that smart.  And that's okay.  Because when I see something like this.  I know that there is no way in the world I could ever be this stupid.

I just can't imagine people with brains and money wasting their time and their money to do something this stupid and this cruel.  And then when you consider how many people in this country are going hungry for these people to basically take this kind of animal that we actually use for food and then basically to use this animal for entertainment while destroying the potential of the food.  Well like I said.  People can say that I'm crazy or they can say that I'm stupid, but there's no way in the world that I'm as stupid as this is.

I really do believe that we need as a people to start looking at some of our behavior.  And I hope that you will start by looking at this petition and join me and the others who are supporting this measure.  And that you will please sign in support this petition.

Thank you.

Daily life: schedule, personal health, personal

Personal health:

Well, I got the rest I needed.  That's a good thing.  And I'm not going to take a shower I don't think until the weekend after intense shopping and gotten my sugar levels back sort of in the normal range.  I made my chemistry is okay.  It's just, well, it could be a little bit better.  But that's just how things are at the end of the month.  And that's one of the reasons I'm going to be having stuff delivered.  Because that way I can actually buy in greater quantity.  So that at the end of the month I won't end up where I am right now where my diet isn't as complete as it should be.

Roller Skating in the Shopping Mall

11:33 PM, EDT:

I just was looking at my Gmail to see if there was any important mail that I may need to have in my MS Outlook program and there's nothing.  What I did see were hundreds and I mean that sincerely hundreds of e-mail in one day, all asking for money.  You down, I am so glad that I am old.  And I'm not really out in the world anymore.  I am so glad when you consider that for example in Denzer.  We have a school board in this country that wants to take out any references to civil disobedience and to do so with the intention of making our children as stupid as possible.  I am so glad that I'm old and that I won't be in the world much longer.  I am so glad.  Because there's just no way I want to live in the world is ruled by so much narrowminded and extremely backward thinking.

When I see some of the crap event the right wing Christian extremists are trying to pull in this world.  The only result is that I hope I leave the world as soon as possible.  I mean, there's just no way I want to be part of the world.  That is so backward and so absolutely stupid that they don't want children being taught about civil disobedience.  But that's the right wing Christian conservative extremists.  That's what they want.  They want our children growing up to be as stupid as they possibly can be.  Then show you how little respect the right wing Christian conservative extremists in the United States have for their own children.  They don't want them to be intelligent they don't want them to be smart they want to be stupid they want their own children to be as stupid as possible and to simply do exactly what they are told to think what they are told to wake up and go to sleep when they are told.  They want them to dress how they are told to feel what they are told to believe what they are told.  And to never think in any terms or any way that anything in this world, has any value.  And to be taught that the entire universe does not really even exist.  That the only thing that exists in the entire universe is this planet Earth and everything else in the entire universe was made by Satan.  And that this planet was the only thing that was ever created by God and the only thing on this planet that was ever created by God or white Christians.  And everything else in the entire universe was created by Satan and they want their children knowing that everything in the world was created by Satan except white Christians.

In the world that's full of stupidity believe me.  I am glad I am not leaving my house.

The easy choice.  When you are my age, or at least for me I can't even say when people are my age because I can't really speak for anyone else.  All I can do is speak for myself.  So the easy choice at my age is to not do anything to not care about anything.  And yet I don't want to do that.  I don't think that's the way to go.  I just don't.

One of the reasons I don't like social networks is because on the social network.  If I ever try to say anything or have any kind of opinion.  It's like I'm standing on a street facing millions of people with machine guns.  Only the guns aren't filled with bullets.  They are filled with all sorts of opinions.  To the point where if you say anything.  You immediately become a target.  I don't like that.  There's just no way in the world I like that.  In my Journal I can say something and have an opinion.  And then people have a very easy choice.  They can either read what I write, or they don't have to read what I write.  And then if they want to they can use their own actual legitimate e-mail, and they can write me an e-mail and tell me what they think.  People generally don't.  But they have the opportunity to do so.  So that's why I really don't like social networks.  Because I don't really like open running gun battles of debate.  I just don't enjoy that.  I've been through that for years.  And I just got fed up with it.  I mean, I just don't really enjoy that.  Everybody's got an opinion.  That's why I like my Journal.  It's just a Journal.  It's just a kind of diary.  Not much else.  Just a kind of diary.

I read about Windows 10.  And my attitude is to wait and see.  My guess instincts are telling me that every time I've ever put any faith in either Dragon NaturallySpeaking or Microsoft.  I have usually gotten screwed.  I mean, I put my faith in IE 11.  And that turned out to be a nightmare.  I put my faith in DNS 11 and that was a total nightmare.  And then I put my faith in DNS 12.  And that really was a fairly decent program.  Except that it has no compatibility with IE 9.  And as absolutely hardly any compatibility with IE 11.  So DNS 12 was really a bad idea.  Plus it has three separate programming modules to the program.  Plus it has that rich text editor, which basically screwed everything up.  No.  I like things nice and simple.

I'm still really tired.  I woke up having nightmares again.  But that's normal.  So I'm probably not going to do a lot of writing right now because I need to go back to sleep.  I can't believe how stupid we humans have become.  I mean, there are huge sections of this world that are so absolutely intelligent.  Right on the cutting edge.  I mean that.  We have young people all over this country who are so right on top of everything.  And then we have other sections of this country and the world that basically take pride in being as stupid as it possibly can be.  I just don't really feel very comfortable being part of the world anymore.  I like being here in my home away from all the noise.  It's just so much more comfortable.

This month has been really strenuous.  I mean it hasn't been so strenuous.  Not just economically, but in almost every other way.  There are so many petitions.  And one of the real values to converting all my petitions from e-mail over to news feeds.  Is that I'm now seeing every single petition, where any e-mail I would only be seeing.  The more important ones.  And I'm telling you some of the petitions are just absolutely scary.  I read one petition the other day.  Where the person was saying that they wanted to have God put back into the schools and have it taught in the schools that anyone who is not white and Christian was actually working for Satan.  And that they want this taught in all the schools so that our children will grow up and make sure that if they come in contact with anyone who's not white and Christian they will do the right thing and beat the crap out of the other person.  And then of course I see lots of petitions where in education the petitions have to do with not wanting a certain teacher at school or wanting a certain teacher to be at school.  It's all just complete insanity.

And then there are petitions dealing with the media, which get to be even more insane.  Petitions where people want a certain TV show to be back on the air or they want another TV show off the air or they want a certain character brought back in a TV show.  I mean of all the things we did worry about in this world we actually have people that are worried about a TV show or a character in a TV show.  Of course we do.  I mean, the air is becoming so poisonous that we have children now that are having motor response problems as a result of a bronchial infection and the doctors aren't even sure why.  And then we now have a case of Ebola here in the United States, which is a very serious thing.  And in the midst of all this we have petitions about TV shows.  Of course we do.

So of anyone is wondering why I really don't want to be out in the world.  All they really have to do is look at some of these petitions and then it becomes crystal clear.  I mean, it's one of the reasons I just don't like being on Facebook.  If I actually had a group of friends I could communicate with.  Then I probably wouldn't mind.  But nobody from Fort Lewis college ever really communicates with me.  Neither do any of the people from southern Arizona school.  The people I communicate with don't even live here in Cleveland and none of them actually belong to Facebook.  And we never really communicate publicly of all.  Because they are to a great extent like me.  They just don't like all of this noise.  The world has gotten so full of conflict.  It's like the world is on the verge of having a massive nervous breakdown.  Which is okay.

I mean, it's really not my problem.  I can't do anything about it.  I can't really be on my feet for very long anyhow.  Again, not because of physical strength.  But because my bones have become so sensitive.  And I can't really be outside.  Not because I have trouble breathing.  But because I have this real stupid allergic reaction to the stuff that's in the air.  And nobody gets it.  That's why it's just easier being here in my house.  Alone.  I wonder what I will do when the cats finally expire.  I think at that point I will probably use the telephone and make arrangements for someone to deliver to the house a couple of cats..  I do like having animals in the house.  It's just comforting.  I mean, my cats are crazy.  But they are comforting.  They are actually like children.

See if I tried to do this on Facebook or some other social network.  I mean, if I tried to write the way I am right now.  I would be hit with a barrage of all sorts of opinions.  And I just don't enjoy that.  I'm becoming an old man.  And there's just a lot more effort in maintaining my balance, psychologically and emotionally and spiritually.  So that I don't really have a lot of time or energy to put into running gun battles of debate.  It all seems just so incredibly stupid.  Besides my days are really rather simple.  Tomorrow I will take a shower and then sort of stumble through my day.  Because these last few days before the end of the month remaining before I get my next check generally are rather strenuous.  Because you're basically running out of everything.  Just trying to get through.  And that's okay.

Because next month or meaning on Friday.  When I get my check, then everything will be different.  Because everything will be delivered.  And I won't have to leave my house anymore.  Except when I go see Dr. Gottesman.  And that's fine.  I don't even know how I appear to other people.  Some people tell me that I don't look to be the age I am at all.  Partially because I have a good head of hair.  And I don't have any of the physical science that a lot of people do is they are getting older.  But that's because I don't eat a lot of the junk that both he believed.  And I don't do a lot of the junk that most people do.  I don't drink.  I don't take any kind of drugs.  I don't do anything.  And I live a very natural life.  And I maintain my health, and I exercise.  And I keep things incredibly claim.  And I don't expose myself to pollution or smog.  And a lot of people think that my doing that is really sort of stupid.  And yet when we hear things like these children suffering from this bronchial illness.  And then we hear people getting Ebola.  Well, under those circumstances perhaps my wearing a breathing mask doesn't sound quite as stupid.

I'm not a germaphobe.  Meaning I'm not phobic about germs.  I'm just very careful.  And I have to be.  At my age, any one of these germs can actually take me out.  That's the truth.  So I have to be even more careful than I was when I was younger.  Which makes even more sense for me not to really go out very much in the world.  Because the world is getting more difficult as far as different diseases and illnesses people are getting.  So like I say may be in a matter of months.  There'll be a lot of people wearing breathing masks here in Cleveland.  Because even though the air quality might be in the green.  Meaning that there is not really a lot of pollution.  Still, there is that other pollution that really isn't very easy to measure.  That's in the air.  Like those pollutants that are actually causing people to get bronchial infections and so forth.  So again, it just makes perfect sense that I really don't go out into the world for them much anymore.

The very first year Aileen had died I was somewhat afraid of this happening.  That I would end up living in my house.  I'm not really going anywhere.  And yet.  I'm not so afraid of that anymore.  Because what I see going on in the world is not really very good.  People trying to kill each other.  People yelling and screaming and arguing about money.  And for what?

I always wondered how I would feel I got to be older.  Now I don't wonder anymore.  Because I am older.

So we will see what happens.

I'm going to go back to sleep.  And then tomorrow I will take a shower and clean up.  And then I will do more petitions and read more e-mail.  And right in my Journal.  I really am on a kind of spiritual journey.  I can see that's true.

I'll write later.

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

College Holiday

6:51 PM, EDT:

I wanted to mention something about this movie college Holladay.  Ursula stars Jack Benny and Burns and Allen, and of course Martha Raye.  Now there is a sequence near the end of the film.  When there is a minstrel show put on by the college students.  But it's, at least in my estimation, done very tastefully.  And I have so many friends who are black Americans and Muslims throughout the United States and the world and I don't want anyone to think in any way that I was being remiss or cavalier.  Because that's not true at all.  Another one of my favorite films actually is a Day at the races with the march brothers.  Because, according to my father told me.  And as I said, he used to play cards with the march brothers.

My father told me that the movie a Day at the races was actually Harpo Marx's idea.  And then he came up with the idea because he was interested.  And including the black American talent in Hollywood at the time in this film.  And I have to say that the musical sequence in the film with the black American talent in the film is absolutely incredible he really really beautiful.  I mean, it's just a very exciting piece of music or sequence of musical pieces together.  The talent is incredible.

I mean, there are films that I enjoy that actually do play out a lot of the toughness that existed in America and how unfair America was to black Americans at the time.  Helmets very much a favorite of mine, for obvious reasons.  Is the movie Showboat with Helen Morgan.  And I say, for obvious reasons, because of course my father was married to Helen Morgan.  Prior to marrying my adopted mother.  So I've always enjoyed that film.  But the amazing music in the film is just absolutely beyond anything.  Because for example Paul Robeson, who is one of the male leads in the film is absolutely beyond anything you could ever imagine as far as a singing talent.  I mean, he's just incredible.  Furthermore, what some people may not know is that he spent most of his life as a human rights advocate and activist.  And when Aileen and I first worked together and we watched this movie together, we were absolutely stunned by the quality of his voice.  And we were so much that what we did was we followed a lot of his career.  And actually watched a number of different exposés about him.

So I don't want anyone thinking that I'm cavalier or being offhanded with some of the films I talk about.  College Holladay is just a very interesting film.  Because it's one of the few movies you actually see Jack Benny in.  And it's just a very very interesting how.  And the dancing and the musical numbers are really very good.  I mean, they are just very very good.

I mean, I've always felt very strongly that the racism in this country has been absolutely a disgrace.  Not just because I was subjected to racism but because I've had some money friends in different minority communities that have been subjected to the same.

But a lot of times I'll watch one of these older films.  Just to take my mind off of things.  Because I really do enjoy musicals.  The movie Showboat with Helen Morgan and Irene Dunne is absolutely just stellar.  I read done has one of the most or at least had one of the most incredible voices.  I wish I could have known her.  Of course I also wished I could've known Helen Morgan.  She was such a troubled soul.

I mean, I wish I could've known half the people I've seen in these films.  Because they are just amazing people.  Not for any reason just to learn from them.  But I've always been attracted to opera and ballet and the arts.

But sometimes is I'm going to sleep I actually use different kinds of films.  If I want to connect with my darling, Aileen.  If I want to draw her out and in through the house.  I always watch the ghost and Mrs. Muir.  Because that really is our film.  At least that's how we always felt.

But I've had some rice, and I feel a lot more grounded.  But I'm definitely ready for some sleep.

I just read that there has been a case of Ebola discovered in Texas.  And I also read that the CDC is saying that there aren't number of these bronchial infection cases where the children are actually losing strength in their limbs.  This is not a good sign.  I mean, these two things together are not a good sign.  I can't help but feeling that these children may in fact be getting the virus that they are getting from some of the poisonous we are putting into the air and into the water.  I mean, if this is true and I don't think that it is the I'm not really sure because I'm not in the medical field.  I'm just first aid.  But if these illnesses are traced back to any of the poison we are putting into the water with fracking or into the air.  I just can't imagine how things are going to turn out if that's the case.

And with Ebola already being in Texas, this is definitely not a good sign.

Maybe it's a good thing that I am wearing a breathing mask when I go out.  For all I know we all may have to be wearing breathing masks pretty soon.  And then I wonder how the Republicans and some of these unscrupulous wealthy will try and figure out a way to laugh.  Because I don't believe it will be a laughing matter.

My hopes up, my prayers are with the families and children and the people who are suffering as they always are.  I pray for their safety.

I'll write later.

The Joy of Getting Old

4:26 PM, EDT:

If anyone thinks I'm really thrilled about not being able to walk around freely or to walk back and forth from the store.  Then they probably don't really know me very well.  Because it's not what I enjoy.  It's not what I want.  But a little ass couple of times I went to the store by walking.  I just had to finally get to a point where I realized it was getting just a bit too much.  Not because of my physical strength, but because the gambit of my bones.  It's hard for people to understand this when they look at me.  Because when you see me.  You see someone who is in rather good physical condition, which I am.  I'm not overweight, I am fairly muscular.  And I'm fairly athletic.  I'm in really very good physical condition.

What you can't see are the issues that my bones have.  That my bones are incredibly strong and dance.  I don't have osteoarthritis under any circumstances.  But what I do have is rheumatoid arthritis.  Not to the point where my hands are performed but to the point where my hands have knots at the large knuckle extending the fingers.  Which is normal.  And my feet have canker toes.  But again, that is a semi-rheumatoid arthritic related condition.  Canker toes actually are related to rheumatoid arthritis.  Not directly.  So nobody really sees the damage in my bones.  Just like nobody can see the peculiar allergy or allergic condition I have regarding the various types of pollutants that are in the air, such as radon gas.  But just because people can't see these things doesn't mean that they don't exist because they do.

Windows 10

Microsoft introduces Windows 10

Well,  from the sounds of this. Windows 10 can run on pc s like mine. But I'm definitely having a wait and see attitude.

Daily life: schedule, personal health

2:40 PM, EDT:

Well, I've got everything pretty much sorted out.  I haven't entire repertoire of news stories that I can use in the journal regarding politics.  I've caught up on pretty much all of the petitions.  I have plans to be able to do news stories regarding general alerts and product recalls things of that nature.

I've made arrangements, where I'm not actually going to have to leave the house anymore unless I'm going to the doctor.  There are a number of places online where I'm able to take care of whatever I need for the house.  This of course I'm doing partially because the pollution level in Cleveland is what it is but also because the only real problem I have is that when I'm on my feet for a certain amount of time.  It just gets to be rather difficult.  And so because I do walk slow walking to and from the store is just basically not really feasible.  And I certainly don't want to rely on anyone being anyone in the neighborhood because I just don't feel comfortable about that.  Everyone has their own problems and I don't like burdening others with mine.

So everything looks like it's moving forward.  And regarding Internet Explorer and everything I've said, it's fair to say that a lot of the issues I was having with Internet Explorer were not really so much of a problem with Internet Explorer as much is it was a problem with Dragon NaturallySpeaking interfacing with and being compatible with or synchronized with Internet Explorer.  The fact is I've run into this problem before.  There was a time with Dragon NaturallySpeaking nine and Dragon NaturallySpeaking 11 when the C. runtime routine for Dragon NaturallySpeaking was actually interfering with Internet Explorer.  So, I don't want anyone to think that I'm totally against Internet Explorer because using IE 9 with Dragon NaturallySpeaking or DNS 10, is actually one of the best things I could have done.

And I'm definitely planning on increasing my exercise and also changing my eating habits slightly.  And of course after the first of the year, God willing, I will purchase a stationary exercise bicycle where I will definitely start getting my legs.  And everything else in a lot better shape even though I am in really fairly decent shape right now.  It's just my bones.  That's the real problem with walking.  My bones.  I can be on my feet for a little while.  But after a certain amount of time.  My bones and my feet begin to just absolutely have an issue, which sort of makes sense because they are between 25 and 30 years older than the rest of my body.  Just as a result of the trauma of the operation.

And then of course there's the pollution or more specifically in my case, the radon gas.  Not to mention the fact that as I'm walking alongside of the roadways with the cars driving right past me, then I'm actually in healing a lot of that pollution coming right out of their cars.  So it's just not really as healthy as like walking in the woods.

As I've said before, as human rights advocates and climate change advocates it is really up to us at this point to be as strident as we can as resistant as we can.  Because the other side is just not going to give in.  They're just not going to.  It's not in their nature.

So I look for a lot more increased activity and so forth.  I'm definitely getting back in the swing of things I'm totally in control of my system at this point in the pollution is actually in rather peculiar because at 8:30 AM this morning.  It was 52, which is solidly in the yellow range.  But then by 1130 it was down to only 8.  So I'm definitely a little worn out.  Part of that is just the changing barometric pressure and the end of the month and the time of the year.  And I guess even a little bit is my age.  I will be producing online air-quality reports probably later today.  But for a while I'm just going to relax and rest.  I just need to take some time.  I think I have a bowl of hot cereal and just relax for a while.  I can almost feel the dark feelings sort of pressing me.

But I'm not going to give into those feelings.  That's why I'm taking a step back.  There's no reason for me to write when I'm not really on top of things.  And now that I have everything completely worked out.  I mean, I have everything settled sorted.  I should never have left DNS 10.  It's the best version I've ever used.  Like I said, it's the one that I used to maintain the entire medical record for Aileen.  So it's really a very solid version and it doesn't take up hardly any memory.

So I'm definitely taking some time.

I know my writing is really hard to read sometimes because I am so strident.  And controversial and even combative.  But unfortunately, whether I like it or not, that's really the kind of writing that you have to do as a human rights advocate.  You have to be controversial, you have to be combative and incisive.  Because.  It's just the way that human rights really is.  As long as human beings had been in the world there have been to 1° or another human rights issues.  It's just the nature of humanity.  There have always been people who would look at what was currently going on in humanity and feel that there was probably a better way of doing things.  So consequently there is always been human rights advocates in the world.  Actually topographies was in fact a human rights advocate.  That's what he did.

So, it's somewhat important that everyone understand that I don't hate anyone.  I don't have any kind of hatred for any human being the matter what they've ever done or what they ever will do.  I just don't hate people.  Behavior is another thing.  We choose our own behavior they behave the way we want and as a result things go badly.

So, I will write later I'm sure because I can definitely feel some of the dark thoughts pressing in on me.  That's why I want to take a break.  So again, I'm sure I will write later.

I send good energy and high hopes for happiness, good health, and all good things always to everyone.

Blessed be.

The mind is like a book.  Opened and much is learned.  Closed and nothing is learned.  (Nicole Maschke, 1994).

Daily life: Schedule

1:07 PM, EDT:

I've actually caught up a good bit on the petitions and my e-mail and the news stories.  So I meditate about 60 minutes to meditate and relax and I'll come back.  I'm just giving my voice a rest.

I'll write later.

GMO Crops Accelerate Herbicide and Insecticide Use While Mainstream Media Gets It Wrong » EcoWatch


GMO Crops Accelerate Herbicide and Insecticide Use While Mainstream Media Gets It Wrong » EcoWatch

12:33 PM, EDT:

This of course is one of the reasons I do not watch public TV.  Meaning general television.  I would rather read the news.  Because that way I have the person putting in black-and-white what they are actually saying.  And I don't need all of the hyperboles and all of the other stuff that goes on with the talking heads.  Because it's been these talking heads keep saying that GMOs is are not dangerous.  And yet look what we have.

I urge you to take a very serious look at this report.  Because you are looking at reality.

If this is the kind of world you want.  No problem.  Because this is the kind of world you have.

Scientists Find Extreme Weather Events Fueled by Climate Change » EcoWatch


Scientists Find Extreme Weather Events Fueled by Climate Change » EcoWatch

12:28 PM, EDT:

I think what is most interesting about this report is that it was done by a meteorologist.  I think that speaks volumes.  We have a lot of whether people in the United States who claim that there is no global warming know climate change taking place.  So I suppose you probably hate this one meteorologist who stands out saying something different.  Right?

This is food for thought ladies and gentlemen.  In my article entitled, global warming research, which can be found at the top of this Journal page.  I think you'll find that reading rather interesting regarding the potential changes that have been predicted by the best scientific minds a little as 150 years.  And if you don't like what they have to say then the next question is very sincerely.  Why did the world give these scientists so many awards for their scientific achievements if the world suddenly does not want to listen to the scientists when they are talking about climate change?

Food for thought.

Feds Approve Cove Point Fracked Gas Export Facility » EcoWatch


Feds Approve Cove Point Fracked Gas Export Facility » EcoWatch

12:17 PM, EDT:

Like I said, you are Republicans, whether you are actors on TV or in the movies or human the musicians and you artists, and all you wonderful hard-working Republicans who are supporting the Republican Party.  You go right ahead and do so.  Because the air is getting dirtier.  And when the air gets dirty to a point.  Just because you are a Republican or a white Christian you will not be immune from the poison in the air.  When the air gets poisonous and not you and your family and your children will die just like anyone else.  You will suffocate.  Because when the air gets too dirty nobody will be able to breathe.  And when that happens, of course, all you Republicans will be sitting there blaming everyone else for the air pollution.  Because you won't take any responsibility for what you've done except the entire world sees you doing what you are doing.

So you go right on and keep backing the Republican Party and all these decisions, where they are helping big business to suck the life out of this planet and to poison the air.  Go right on and do that.  Because when the air gets to poisonous and to dirty evening you Republicans even you with lots and lots of money.  You will either have to start wearing gas masks or never leaving your home or you will have to figure out somewhere else you can go because the air will be so poisonous here on Earth did you won't be able to breathe.

And then you'll have a really hard choice to make.  Because a lot of your really good Christians so is good Christians, you'll probably have to make the choice as to whether district just killing people shooting babies killing children murdering women in order to get more air.  And more water and food or you might actually do the humane thing and the honest thing and admit that you basically backed the wrong horse.  They can put all your support behind the Republican Party thinking they were going to tell you the truth and that everything was just nothing but hot air figure generally speaking.  And that there's no truth to climate change and you keep taking that point of view.  Because really the only real proof in all of this is that all you have to do is be willing to die in order to prove the rest of the world wrong.  So the lender Republicans are willing to do that.  I mean, if you are willing to die and have your families die and to drink poisoned water and breathe poisoned air.  Just so that you can prove everyone else wrong.  Please feel free to do so.

For my part.  It doesn't matter.  My life is basically over.  It doesn't matter to me, personally, whether I die today or tomorrow I don't really give a damn.  But that's not why do these articles I do these articles because I'm concerned with all of you.  You who are younger, who have families who have mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers and sons and daughters.  You who are concerned or the safety of your children like I am concerned, of course the safety of my daughter.

But the fact remains.  You guys go ahead and keep sucking the life on this planet and see what happens.  The air will get so dirty at one point they won't matter whether you are a white Christian or a Republican or whether you are some wealthy person living in any city in this country or anywhere in the world it's not been a matter how much money you have it's not a matter who you are when the water becomes poisonous enough and the air becomes to poisonous you in your money and all of your thinking.  You will end up dying just like anyone else begin a matter what else you might think you are still a human being.  You are still one of the animals in this world and animals need oxygen, and they need water.

And when you poison all the water in the world and you poison the air.  Where are you going to get the air you need to breathe where are you going to get the food you need to eat.  Where are you going to get the water you need to drink?  Of course you would all your money might just be able to make all that stuff artificially and and place cards or on your property so that any child who walked by your property will get immediately shot to death any woman or man who ever comes near your property will immediately get killed and then you'll be there alone in your home with all that artificial water, artificial food and artificial air and you will be go anywhere and there won't be any government because a lot of people will be dead.  And you just be there inside your home with all that food and water and air.  And nobody to talk to nobody to be around thinking that you were right all along and that there's no global warming because you're just fine.

Even though the rest of the world is dying.

So go ahead, keep believing in these Republicans when they tell you there's no problem.  And then wait for about 10 or 15 years.  And then try saying that again.

It's your karma....  Not mine....